Thank you for signing with us Kim Jae Ra to begin your kpop journey at LIVEX Entertainment, but you must complete the below as you are under the required age of 19 so parental consent is required :
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I kept on reading this in complete focus, drowning out my surroundings milking each word. Specifically, the sentence 'Must complete before the 20/05/2023' stood out to me particularly.
This meant that I actually had to go to my parents, imagining the thought of giving this to my mum let alone my dad was a headache within it's own. So just like that I sulkingly dragged myself to school. A part of me has a mine of unexploded excitement at the thought of being an idol like Hari Ma.
An iconic idol who is considered the nations daughters and the PinkPunk of our generation. Pink Punk the girl group of the previous 3rd generation of kpop who broke many records and created memorable songs to never be forgotten.
At this point in time, I had actually been sitting in class, my brown golden ombre hair dangling in front my face like a curtain . I lay slouched down in the world of dreams, a dream which had always been a secret wish, a secret dream. To be an idol.
Okay, at this point I was in my main character arc, I had definitely been bloated with hope at this possibility of being the very idol that fans obsessively clawed at for facecards and even a glance. I even gloated the thought of having my own random edited videos of me, I could even imagine the shipping edits because of a 0.5 second glance at a male kpop idol.
However I couldn't lie I slightly giigled at the thought, I had my moral principles and rational side of my mind. Of course there were so many good looking and beautiful idols, so I started to think that I looked quite average in comparison.
So, picture this: a bunch of girls in my London hood area getting all the spotlight for just being regular East/South-East Asian girls. It's like they discovered a secret skill called "existing."
But, the plot twist is that the hype machine kicked in because the neighboring schools were basically EastAsian deserts.
It was different in Korea, no in this school in which was full of aspiring idols , actresses, dancers and singers. Almost 90% of this school were far above the average standards of appearance. It was either unreal visuals, because to be honest many did get surgery, but that did not undermine their beauty. Either way they looked ready to step into the idol industry at any time of day. Everyone here was extraordinary in some way or another.
Just in the middle of that deep thought, I was interrupted but it was none another than my friend. Jihyeon tapped me, abruptly waking me up from semi-conscious state of mind. I looked at her quite consciously ,
"What is it Jihyeon?"
Then I look around curiously, I had been in Literature class when I realised everyone was gone.
"Hey, Jae Ra everyone's gone to lunch I came here and you were just staring into space... Oh and some students are still talking about that... Meme situation. " Jihyeon explained in a well balanced tone cautiously, seen in her mannerisms in effort to not cause me discomfort at the word 'meme'.
However, I surprising was unbothered by it, in fact I triumphed in my mind. This actually turned out to benefit me, because this means I had already built an online presence and an image for myself which may lead fans to be curious about me.
As I walked out of the classroom I walked in full confidence, unlike most of the people who made fun of me they didn't recieve a offer from a top entertainment company. Like I did!
It was funny, because after that I had dance lessons, funny enough Park Joon Tae wasn't in. (I mean he in an idol it was obvious that he wasn't going to be in most of time).
I mean it wasn't like I was going to act like I absolutely did not care that I had been publicly humiliated online and was completely unbothered by it.
Okay, I was.
But still, because of him it was very awkward for me to adjust myself in class, as it seemed whenever we were dancing people were carefully analysing my every move. The painstakingly long wait for the girl - me - to finally make a mistake so that they had something to laugh at.
Of course, under all that pressure I wasn't able to dance freely, as good as I wish I could as they obviously undermined my abilities.
However I came to the realisation after watching videos that in order to get accepted into these big companies you actually had to be talented. So that must of meant that I had actually performed really well, so well that I didn't even have to do a 2nd and 3rd audition. That was impressive, right?
When I realised that I felt my confidence take one small step up the ladder on my confidence scale.
I think I did slightly more better because people in class had actually been looking at me with something a bit more different than scrutinising and analysing glares, but more like admiration.
Or maybe I'm seeing things, well I don't think so, because when I finished dancing everyone clapped. Even the girl who patronised me with her insults began praising me, saying she was suprised to see that I was actually... Talented.
I then imagined more, a bigger dream; to be an idol. An idol with talent. Just like the idols I dedicated hours to editing and posting on my account. I could be one of those people, no I could be like them.
As I walked out with a newfound ambition, it felt different the feeling the thought. Just then my phone buzzed and I opened it to see something I wouldn't expect.