No one listened. Even after I warned them that my mental state wasn't currently good including my current mood and even proved it by killing a maid as soon as she set one foot into the attic, the servants still rushed in.
A massacre. It was a complete massacre. Some of the servants were burnt to death by my flames, just like how they acted like witches(mean bitches) towards me. Others had their feet burnt, which made their movement either worse or restricted completely, allowing me to cleanly slice most their necks while some was in so much agony from the pain they felt from burns that they ended their lives themselves.
My fire... it was no longer the same warm fire that I had before. It had become more powerful and hotter, burning human skin more easily. It was probably my mental state that made it stronger, or maybe it was my change in personalities. Perhaps both actually. My personality changed because of my mental state and the strong emotions surging in my chest seems to be the source of how my flames grew stronger.
"I really don't understand," I knelt down and wiped a tear running down a maid's cheek, "why do you and the others go so far just to try to end me?" the woman's face was engulfed into flames as soon as I got back up. "Have I offended you in anyway? Have I ever done anything bad before this? Have I ever meddled you in your life" I felt anger building up inside me once again, "Then why do you meddle with mine? Why... WHY?!"
I suddenly hear a sudden noise and turned to see a male sitting next to the third family head's portrait that was slightly moved, shaking. I could tell he was one of the butlers that barged in here to take my head from the uniform he's wearing. For some reason, he looks familiar.
"M-Mother! Y-You killed my mother!" he shouted, pointing at me. Oh, that's why.
I walked up to the pile of heads that I had decapitated and grabbed the head of the maid who was killed first by the hair before tossing it at the butler's feet.
"There, you can take your mother's head with you. I don't burn decapitated heads," I said. I really wouldn't do it. Just imagining my own head get burnt after my execution made me irritated, so I wouldn't do that to someone else's head unless if it's absolutely necessary.
"M-Monster!" he said, moving away from his mother's decapitated head that was bleeding from one of its eye.
"Don't call me that," I grabbed his hair and lifted him up to look at me, "my name is 'Felix Infermel', not 'monster', not 'criminal', not 'true evil', not 'trash' or any of those names. Got it?" the butler nodded rapidly with tears building up in his light brown eyes. Not pretty. His eyes weren't as pretty as William's and neither were his mother's eyes (or now eye). "I'll let you go but it you tell anyone about this, I'll put both your and your mother's heads on a stick. Go." I let go of his hair and he falls onto the ground, scrambling away.
As soon as he left, I collapsed on my knees and stared up at the ceiling; motionlessly. Even after killing all those people just now, I don't fell bad. Not at all. Not an ounce of guilt was in my body. I wouldn't say I'm happy or satisfied though. The empty feeing that I had experienced maybe once or twice before has once again appeared. I'm not sure if it's just because my mind is a mess or if I'm simply confused, but I felt like that feeling emptiness filled every nook and cranny of my body, numbing my other emotions and senses.
Wren was right. Before when Wren said: 'even if most villains were good and innocent people, there's a reason why some of them were chosen to become a villain', I only thought of it from an outsider's perspective when thinking of how bad those people could've been to be chosen to become a villain however, now I can only question why I've never thought I would become someone who's 'worthy' to deserve the role of a villain.
In this current moment, I can clearly tell why I have the role of a villain. Heroes have goals and people they want to protect, just like how Felix the hero wants Kassiel to stay intact for Theodore. Even Eason felt the need to help me after he felt guilt from his future memories, though that could be because he has a fragile mind since he's a kid right now, but that doesn't matter.
While heroes have those things, we villains don't. Heroes are closer to many people, meaning they have lots to protect and take care of, while we villains most likely only have one which means after they're gone, we don't feel anything including guilt.
William was weaker than me. After the one he cared the most for died, he as a villain had nothing left. William might not have seen me as someone close enough to him to stay alive for me, or maybe it was the law of fairy tales here that forbid him to stay alive any longer while I, 'true evil', must live with an empty void where my heart use to be and continue to walk alone in crowded streets with no one I know or anyone I'm close to.
"Felix!" dad yelled, appearing right outside the attic door with Alberu behind him.
"Dad...?" I said with tears streaming down my face, though I didn't express any emotion. It was like the tears were there for no reason.
"Felix... you're ok," Alberu seemed surprised to see my tears. He approached me, ignoring the slightly burning ground and bloody mess on the floor, engulfing me into a hug.
My mind was empty, and so was my entire body. The tears that flowed from my eyes held no meaning at all, or at least I think they don't. They could've appeared because I was confused. Maybe because I'm sad? Perhaps because I'm afraid- afraid of what I've become. I know for sure that I'm no longer the cowardly and weak past self however, am I still 'Felix Infermel'?
This anger, hatred and emptiness made me feel like someone else. The anger could belong to Cyrus since he's hot headed, the hatred could belong to the future me who's disgusted by how bad I was treated, but the emptiness... who does that belong to?
"Alberu, who am I?" I asked.
"What do you mean? You're Felix," Alberu seemed confused.
"Felix... the same Felix that you always knew?"
"No, you seem..." Alberu paused, "different. It's a little like you're another person sometimes." Another person... is this a side effect of awakening one of Esper's heads since she's said to have two personalities (although it's just Cyrus and Lumi)? I was in Eason's body when he awakened Lumi's power, but he never got another personality or... was I the second personality? If that is so then... who is the real me? What if... I am Eason?
"Alberu," I placed my hand on his shoulder firmly, "if I ever do something the current me wouldn't do," I bit my bottom lip, "kill me."
"What?" Alberu's eyes widened.
"What the hell are you saying?!" shouted dad. "I came up here because I heard a lot of noise and now you're talking nonsense while there's dead bodies all around you! What is going on?"
"I killed them," I answered without hesitation. I guess threatening that butler from earlier was pointless since I was going to tell them that I was the one who killed the servants anyway.
"Why?" dad raised his eyebrow.
"Why do I need a reason to kill someone? I could be doing it just for fun. Don't you know dad? They call me a 'criminal', a 'villain'."
"No, everyone has a reason to kill someone, but I know that you specifically would never kill someone just for fun. I don't care what others call you. You are our family's Felix, not a criminal or villain. So tell me, why did you kill them?" dad asked.
"Because they were going to kill me. There's papers shared around the capitol written by the one who kidnapped his highness and they said that if I am killed, they'd return his highness and if I am not dead by one month, they'd kill him," I explained.
"Then it's self defence," said dad.
"It's still murder."
"Your death would've also been a murder if you didn't defend yourself. Their punishment for touching my son, adopted or not would not be light either. You helped them escape a torturous punishment by giving them what I assume to be a quick death from the decapitated heads." Dad placed a hand on my shoulder, "forgot about it. This family will protect you. The third head of this house said to 'always put family before strangers', and as a member of this house, I will not ignore his words. Go rest."
"Yes dad," I stood up, grabbing Alberu's hand and left with him.
Even after hearing those reassuring words from dad, I still didn't feel anything. My mind continued to stay blank and even with a few cuts on my body and bruises on my knees from when I collapsed on the ground, I didn't feel any pain. The only thing that I could feel was Alberu's warm hand. It was different from my flames. His temperature was warm, not scorching hot. Holding his hand didn't burn mine like how I burnt Wren's. I didn't need a layer of water magic to protect my hand when I touched Alberu's unlike Kelan.
"Felix, where are we going?" Alberu asked, staring at me with big curious ember orbs.
"To your sword lessons. You have them now don't you?" I said. Alberu is warm unlike me. He's like the sun just like how his previous reincarnation was described to be, they are the same soul after all. He was the first feeling of warmth that I felt after the constant waves of emptiness that appeared. He is kind however, he is weak- weaker than Royce. To prevent others from trampling over him in the future, I will make sure he grows up strong. I will protect his path so that Royce and his group of 'Royce pleasers' cannot hinder Alberu's growth.
This time, I will stick to the ones who didn't cheer at my execution.