The five companions walked until the sun began to dip over the horizon, painting the vast, empty desert in hues of orange and purple. There was nothing but an endless expanse of sand stretching before them. With only two or three hours of daylight left, they decided to find a suitable place to camp. Once settled, Michio skillfully built a small bonfire, its flickering flames casting dancing shadows. They pitched their camp and sat around the growing warmth of the fire.
Abrafo, ever the pragmatist, took out the food his mother had prepared for him, sniffing it several times with a dubious expression. "These are still good. My mother made them," he declared, handing around pieces of bread wrapped in banana leaves.
Yul looked at Michio, who was sitting next to him. "Don't waste our water," he advised, his voice firm.
"Why?" Michio asked, pouring a handful of water onto his face and splashing it around without a second thought.
"We walked for three hours, and all I saw was sand," Yul replied, gesturing vaguely at the bleak landscape around them.
"I'm sure there will be towns nearby," Abrafo said dismissively, taking a large bite of bread.
U-ri, however, nodded in agreement with Yul. "Yul is right. It would be better if we preserve our water just to be on the safe side. Let's use it as little as possible." He then turned his gaze to Hajime, a curious smile on his face. "Hajime, you are a handsome young man. Why did you disguise yourself as an older woman?"
Michio, his eyes wide with curiosity, leaned forward, a pleading smile on his face. "Please tell us!"
Hajime took a deliberate bite of his bread, his silver eyes meeting Michio's. "What kind of monk are you?" he teased, a mischievous glint appearing. "I thought monks are free of attachments?"
Michio chuckled, shrugging his shoulders. "I'm one of a kind. I like the Buddha's teachings, but I hate everything else about the monastery." The four men burst into laughter. Michio's smile faded slightly. "I was kicked out because two elders caught me eating meat," he admitted, a sad frown creasing his brow.
Hajime's smile softened. "I was just teasing your king and the people in that chamber. I have my reasons."
"What's your reason?" Michio pressed, undeterred.
Hajime shook his head, his expression firm. "This is a private matter. I will not share the reason with anyone."
Abrafo, seeing the tension, stepped in. "Michio, let it go. We shouldn't invade each other's privacy. It's good that Hajime mentioned that." He looked at Yul, seeking support. "You agree?"
"As long as it doesn't affect the outcome of our purpose, then we shouldn't invade each other's personal privacy," Yul stated, his voice calm and reasonable. "Unless that person is willing to tell us."
U-ri looked at them, his gaze earnest. "Since we're on this journey together, we have to trust each other and take care of each other. Five of us set off together, and all five of us have to come back together."
"I'll take the first watch," Yul offered, stifling a yawn. "The four of you can go to sleep first."
An hour passed, and Hajime still couldn't fall asleep. He tossed and turned restlessly on the hard ground before finally giving up. He rose, walked over to the small campfire, and sat across from Yul, who was meticulously adding dry twigs to the flames.
"You should sleep," Yul said, glancing up.
"I can't," Hajime admitted with a frustrated sigh. "I'm not used to sleeping on the ground."
Yul chuckled softly, a dry, knowing sound. "Then you'd better start getting used to it, because who knows how many days we'll end up sleeping on the ground." He looked at Hajime, his expression softening with genuine curiosity. "Why are you pretending to be an old lady?"
"I already told everyone," Hajime replied, a hint of defiance in his tone.
Yul sighed, looking at Hajime with an expression of disbelief on his face, a silent challenge in his eyes. "That's not the case. As your husband, I ask you to tell me the truth," he said, his voice firm but not unkind.
Hajime scoffed, a dry, humorless sound. "Don't rush to be my husband. One day, when I find someone who truly loves me, I will leave you no matter what. I know that you forced yourself to marry me because you want to help your kingdom. Besides, I will only marry someone who truly loves me, and you are not that person."
"It's okay if you don't want to tell me the truth," Yul said, his gaze dropping to the fire, though a faint shadow of disappointment crossed his face. "Go to sleep." He picked up a handful of dry twigs, methodically feeding them to the hungry flames.
Hajime looked at Yul, observing the quiet sincerity in his posture. While Yul might not be his true love destined to lift the curse, Hajime recognized him as a good friend, someone who would be there in the unknown future. He didn't want to tell Yul his own painful story, so he decided to tell Yul another person's story instead. "Since neither of us can sleep," Hajime began, a thoughtful expression on his face, "how about I tell you a story?"
Yul looked up, a flicker of interest in his eyes. "Sure."
Hajime began, his voice low, weaving a somber tale. "Once upon a time, there was a very beautiful woman who brazenly claimed to be more beautiful than the goddess of beauty herself. One day, while in a temple, she spat on the statue of the goddess. The enraged goddess cursed her: if she were to give birth, the only child that survived would be a girl. This tragic fate continued for generations. Until one day, the last female descendant gave birth to twins – a boy and a girl. Terrified that her two children would die, she locked the twins inside a remote cave, hoping to keep them hidden from the goddess's wrath. As the twins grew older, they developed feelings for each other and eventually, out of their forbidden love, conceived a baby boy together. In a fit of furious rage, the mother decided to kill her own grandson. When her son heard that his mother intended to murder his child, he fled with his twin sister and their baby. They didn't get far before the mother caught them and, in her anger, forced her son to marry another woman.
The sister, heartbroken and desperate, took their son away from home to fend for herself. As for her brother, tormented by the humiliation and his unrequited love for his sister, he committed suicide. The sister raised her son for seven lonely years. In a brutal winter, with nothing left to eat, the woman grew weak, hungry, and exhausted. On that bitterly cold day, the seven-year-old boy, desperate to find food, left his sick mother lying alone in the dark cave. She starved to death, alone in that cold, dark cave, with no one to hold her hand as she breathed her last breath, before her son returned. One day, the Goddess of Beauty appeared and revealed the cruel family curse to the heartbroken seven-year-old child. She told the little boy that if he found someone who truly loved him, and only him, until his last breath, then the curse would wear off on its own.
When the child was ten years old, he was mercilessly ridiculed and stoned by other children. He couldn't comprehend why an innocent child like him should be punished for the crimes of his ancestors. He decided he no longer wanted to live. One day, he stole a knife from the village and cut his own throat. He endured excruciating pain and died, but instead of reaching the underworld, he woke up in that same dark cave he hated the most. He couldn't understand why. He tried various ways to die, but all failed. One night, the Goddess of Beauty came to see him again and told him that once he gave his heart to the person he loved deeply, and that person also truly loved him, only then could he finally die, and the curse would be broken.
'His mother starved to death because of this so-called Goddess of Beauty! Everything is the fault of this Goddess of Beauty!' the boy thought, glaring at the goddess bitterly and spitting at her feet. The stupid goddess, enraged by his defiance, cursed the boy further: when someone loved him deeply and the curse was broken, he would die within two days, but until then, he would remain immortal. The boy swore to himself that he would defeat heaven. So, when a Fox Fairy inadvertently broke into his cave, he offered his immortal soul to the Fox Fairy to devour, allowing him to evolve to the next stage."
Hajime sighed deeply as he finished telling Yul the other person's story, the tale hanging heavy in the desert air.
Yul looked at Hajime, his expression thoughtful. "That boy's name?"
Hajime smiled faintly, a complex mix of sorrow and defiance. "A product of shame, he has no name."
"I promised to marry you, and I intend to keep my promise," Yul said, his voice firm, meeting Hajime's gaze directly. "Many royals have male mistresses."
Hajime scoffed, a dry, mirthless sound. "But none of them were brave enough to hold their male mistress's hand in public." He chuckled, a wry amusement in his eyes. "Anyway, you are not the kind of person who likes men, and like I said, I will only marry someone who really loves me. I will not be someone else's mistress behind closed doors. You and I, we both know that you decided to marry me out of duty and gratitude. I want you to know that I have a reason to help you."
"What's your reason?" Yul asked, his curiosity piqued.
"If I don't help bring the white dragon tail, I can't leave Tanzang Kingdom to find my true love." Hajime yawned widely, stretching his arms above his head. "I'm tired now." He walked to his bags and lay down. He removed his silver bangle from his wrist and, with a casual flick, threw it into the air. The bangle grew larger, expanding into a shimmering, transparent dome that encircled all five men. "You don't need to stay guard," Hajime mumbled, already half-asleep. "My bangle will keep us safe."
Putting his hands behind his head, Hajime gazed up at the millions of stars that glittered like scattered diamonds across the dark desert sky. The endless pinpricks of light reminded him vividly of that cold, desolate night long ago, when he lay shivering in that back alley, staring at snowflakes silently floating around him. The more he stared at the countless light spots, the clearer his vision became, and the dreaded sounds of kicking and beating grew sharper, more agonizingly real. The sounds Hajime hated the most were his own grunts, and the desperate whimpers that tore from his throat.
"Shi, get out of the way, I can't get a good recording of this fag's face." Akako's cruel laughter echoed in his mind.
"Stop it…" he heard himself pleading, his voice young and terrified. "Stop…"
"Are you interested in being a host?" Ito-san's voice, oily and rushed, sliced through the memory.
"Stop it!" Hajime screamed, the sound tearing from his throat, even in his sleep.
"Hajime-kun…" Aimi shouted, her voice thick with drunken malice.
"Pretty boy like you can become a very popular host." Ito-san's flirtatious voice swooped past, sickeningly familiar.
Hajime covered his ears, writhing on the ground, and choked out, "I'm not interested!"
"Without me, you'd die. Die! Why were you born? I wish you were never born," Aimi shrieked, her words like daggers.
"Stop it, mother…" he whimpered, the memory a fresh wound.
"My dearest Hajime… When you receive this letter, it means that I am no longer in this world." A new memory, softer, but no less painful.
"Papa… don't leave me."
"Fag… do you really think I'm really asking you out?" Shi's cruel smile, a flash of white.
"I'm not looking for love," Hajime whispered to himself, a mantra against the pain.
"Hajime-kun…your ass is so soft and white." Chibi's panting came from right beside his ear, a sickening touch.
"Leave me alone!" He burst into racking sobs. "Leave me alone!"
"Hajime-kun…!" Aimi called out drunkenly again, her voice a terrifying phantom.
"Hajime-kun…" Kenji's voice, soft and pleading, a faint glimmer of solace in the storm.
Yul was carefully adding more wood to the small bonfire when he heard Hajime begin to writhe and whimper, then soft sobs broke from him. He heard Hajime repeatedly whisper, "Stop it."
Concerned, Yul walked over and found that Hajime was in a deep, tormented sleep. Judging by his distressed movements and the pained sounds, Hajime was clearly having a terrible nightmare. He stretched out his hand and gently shook Hajime's shoulder, but the mage seemed utterly engrossed within his dream, unresponsive.
"Hajime, wake up," Yul said, his voice quiet but firm. "Hajime…Hajime…"
Hajime, still caught in the throes of his nightmare, quickly grabbed Yul's hand, his grip surprisingly tight. "Please don't leave me... Please don't leave me..." he begged, his voice muffled, still half in sleep.
"Hajime, you need to get up now," Yul said gently but insistently, pulling Hajime into a sitting position.
Hajime, disoriented but clinging, threw his arms around Yul's waist and buried his face into Yul's chest, his body trembling slightly. "Kenji-san…Kenji-san…please don't leave me…"
Yul sighed, a soft, sympathetic sound, and wrapped his arms around Hajime. He gently patted the back of Hajime's head, his movements slow and comforting. "I won't leave you... okay… I won't leave you… we'll be together for a long time..."
Since Yul was already sitting where he was supposed to sleep, he trusted Hajime's bangle would protect them from harm. He carefully lay back down, pulling Hajime close and hugging him. He reached out, taking the blanket, and covered both himself and Hajime. Yul gently brushed Hajime's soft, white hair back from his forehead.
Yul sighed once more, his voice a soft murmur in the quiet night. "You must have suffered a lot as the last mage of your kind. From now on, you don't have to suffer alone, because we will be by your side every step of the way." He gave Hajime a quick, reassuring smile, then closed his eyes, the weight of the vast desert and their shared destiny settling over him.