I hear her breathing. A slow, fragile breath, as if each inhale could carry the weight of her doubts, her memories, her fears. Behind this silence, there is MI-GHUMI. Not the demonic sentinel portrayed in Marlha's records, but the silent friend, the sister from a lost time, the one who called me by my real name when Hell had not yet sealed our roles.
I close my eyes.
"MI-GHUMI," I say more softly this time. "I understand your fear."
The words escape me with a sincerity I rarely allow myself. "I didn't know that all this time… you lived with this constant dread."
A silence. The kind of silence that speaks louder than a complaint.
I continue:
"Part of what Krehaan says… maybe it's true. We are beings from Hell. This world… we never really loved it. It's not in our nature to protect it."
I feel tension building. She is still there, listening to every syllable as if searching for either condemnation or hope.
I go on:
"But being born from Hell doesn't mean being slaves to its fate."
I walk in my own darkness, the phone still warm in my hand. My breath calms, but my heart beats stronger.
"MI-GHUMI… I didn't come here to destroy. I never had that intention. I don't need that to reach my goal."
A shiver runs through my voice. "I don't know what Krehaan thinks he sees. Maybe he projects his own darkness onto me. But that's not me."
On the other side, she inhales. This time, I hear it.
Then finally, she speaks:
"Then why now? Why surround yourself with those even the abyss fears? Why stay silent when the world is collapsing?"
Her voice trembles, but it's not anger. It's a mix of expectation and fatigue, a cry that no longer wants to be shouted.
I place my hand against the cold wall, as if I could cross the space to transmit my answer through touch.
"Because I'm not a hero, MI-GHUMI. I never claimed to be. But I am… something else. A fissure. A promise. A sentence, maybe. But not a mistake."
I continue, voice steadier:
"I surround myself with monsters because sometimes, only monsters can hunt the real devourers. I stay silent because my words carry a weight I can no longer throw around carelessly. And I am here now… with you, because you matter. Even if you looked at me cautiously, you kept believing I was redeemable. And that… I cannot ignore."
Long silence. Then a slower breath. MI-GHUMI resumes:
"I'm afraid, Natsa. And that's what kills me… because part of me doesn't want to let you go. But I can't fight you… not if you stay like this."
I smile, sadly.
"Then don't fight me. Walk by my side. If I drift… hold me back. If I burn… make sure I don't take everything with me. But if I can still walk straight… then believe in me. One last time."
She doesn't answer immediately. Then comes that whisper, faint but true:
"All right… One last time. But if you lie…"
I interrupt gently:
"If I lie, then I'm no better than the ruins around me. But I won't lie to you, MI-GHUMI. Not to you."
And there, finally, I feel her release. Like a weight dropped.
She has accepted.
But I didn't intend to stop there.
"MI-GHUMI."
"Yes, Natsa?"
Her voice vibrated slightly in the receiver, attentive, almost light now.
"For Krehaan… I'll go anyway."
I pause.
"But I want you to be with me."
A silence. Then a breath of surprise.
"What?" she said, taken aback.
I smile, even if she can't see it.
"That's the best idea. To erase your doubts. And… I want you to understand too where he was coming from that day. I know deep down, you're dying to know."
And her answer comes quickly, animated, almost joyful:
"Yes! You have no idea how much!"
I laugh a little. It's rare I let that out.
"Now, I don't know if you can get free… Ask Ilya Roskarov for a few days off. Even three days. Just so we can carry this investigation through."
She answered without hesitation:
"That's not a problem."
I freeze for a second.
"What? Seriously?"
She laughs softly.
"Yes. Don't worry about that. Ilya Roskarov likes me a lot, you know. I'll explain everything when I come back to Marlha. Let's say… Monday? He can't stop me from taking a little break."
And then she starts talking about him. About this Roskarov. She is carried away, animated, alive. And I listen. I listen, and somewhere, it gnaws at me a little. Not out of jealousy really… no. More like a strange melancholy. She has finally found someone who looks at her differently—not as a weapon, not as a useful monster—but as a person. Someone rare. Someone human.
And I tell myself that when I leave… when Hell calls me again… at least she won't be alone.
She concludes with a contented sigh:
"You understand, Natsa? I even feel like he likes me more than his own family… As if I were his little sister. Or his daughter."
I smile, sincerely this time.
"MI-GHUMI… I'm proud of you. Really. And I understand. So, Monday?"
"Yes, yes, Monday!" she replied eagerly.
"Good… I'm hanging up."
But immediately, her voice:
"Wait!"
I raise an eyebrow.
"What? You still have something to say?"
Silence. Then a timid, fragile voice:
"No… nothing. It's okay. You can hang up."
I let out a light breath.
"Don't worry, MI-GHUMI. Nothing will happen to your beloved universe."
I chuckle softly to lighten the mood a bit. Then I hang up.
The silence of my room catches up with me. Immediate. Brutal.
I sigh deeply and my thoughts return to that day. That battle against the Entity.
I remember… the precise moment when I had to borrow from Satan himself. That silent pact engraved in the fibers of my body.
Since then, it has never fully recovered. Exploiting such transcendent energy is not just an effort—it's a price. A burden.
I lower my eyes to my arm. This limb, always a little colder, a little stranger.
And I think of Krehaan.
Seeing him again… might mean reliving a confrontation like that. Or worse.
My human body… it is too weak. Even with the mask. Too fragile to endure such energies.
I will need support. Something between the spiritual and the physical. A vessel. A catalyst that can absorb this power without shattering me from within.
But what…?
I almost stumble to the couch. I let myself fall there, eyes toward the ceiling.
Thoughts race.
Think, Natsa. Think…
Right now, even a moderate dose of dimensional energy could cause partial disintegration, or a rupture of the nervous system.
I must find a way. And fast.
Because if Krehaan is waiting for me…
…I can't arrive weak.