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Three Months passed.
Tony couldn't believe he was saying it, but he kinda liked Hela. Not speaking in sexual terms, that was already decided the moment he saw her. But rather, he liked her personality. She was hard to talk to at first and very secretive and careful. But as the months went by, Tony paved his way through her defenses.
Before she knew it, she was telling him her life story. And she stopped addressing him in a condescending way. She became less stiff around him as they pretty much shared a meal every day. She brought the stuff, and he cooked.
At the end of the day, she was an Asgardian. Tony found it hard to understand why she became evil. Loki was understandable, he wasn't even an Asgardian. But why Hela? Daughter of Odin himself?
"So, you wanted to keep swinging, but Dad pulled the plug? Classic. Build a monster, then act surprised when it growls. Been there. My old man? Mostly saw me as a future report card he could scowl at. I basically raised myself—with occasional pop-ins for lectures and disapproval. I guess there is no such thing as a perfect father." Tony murmured, sitting side by side with the Goddess of Death.
He had made a couch for them using the fur of a questionable beast. "Locking you up? Yeah, not exactly a wise move. That's like closing your eyes and hoping the problem goes away."
"Odin is anything but wise if what you tell me of Thor and Loki is true," Hela commented, grown accustomed to the Midgardian who talked too much. "What happened to your father afterwards?"
"Oh, he was murdered by a brainwashed super soldier. My mom, too. I miss her the most. She was always there, always believed in me. And she was… just really sweet."
"I don't remember my mother," Hela murmured, devoid of any emotions.
Sighing, Tony got up. "Alright, in the name of our collective misery, let's toast a beer. But we gotta make it first."
####
10 months passed, and Tony learned everything that Hela had to teach. Not just magic, she also shared with him the vast knowledge about the space, the insanely powerful beings such as Galactus, or the omniscient and omnipotent creatures like Eternity and The Living Tribunal, the Celestials. The more he learned, the more he started to feel numb. How small he was, how insignificant. All his wealth on Earth meant nothing out there.
But it was a great experience. Being aware of the vastness of the Universe was better than going in blind.
He also incorporated her magic in his armor. He was now immune to magical energy-based attacks, telepathic attacks, and in general, the armor integrity had been increased. Hela suggested using runes, but Tony didn't trust her with drawing them. She was an ancient being as far as he knew, not very trustworthy.
But he hoped he could trust her. Despite her infamy, he saw a normal woman who was raised to conquer, but was suddenly stopped and imprisoned for the very thing she was raised for. It was a dilemma: could Hela change? Be better?
"Why even conquer? What's so fun about that?" Tony asked her casually one day as he played golf with her. Yes, he taught Hela golf. There was nothing else to do on that planet, and by now, Hela was intrigued with Earth's culture.
The Midgard she knew was from thousands of years ago, humans didn't even know how to grow food back then. But the current Midgard interested her.
Hela scoffed at his question. "Why not? With power like mine, why wouldn't I? Rule, conquer—restore order. Chaos doesn't fix itself."
"You brought up the big guys—Eternity, Living Tribunal. Cosmic heavyweights with the ultimate glow-up. But if it's just about who's got the biggest stick, why aren't they running the universe like it's their personal boardroom? No offense, but ruling everything? Not exactly a vacation. It's endless work, zero thanks, and a guaranteed spot on everyone's hate list. Me? I'll take economic conquest. Same result, better wardrobe," Tony relaxedly replied.
"What would you know about conquering?"
"Well, before the whole kidnapping me thing, I kinda already did that. No wars, no battles—I took over my planet by dangling a shiny future and fixing the economy. At the end of the day, Hela, no one cares who's on the throne. They just want dinner on the table and the newest iPhone without selling a kidney."
Half of his vocabulary made little sense to Hela. But she was knowledgeable enough to deduce the meaning. "That might impress a planet. But across a galaxy? Laughable."
"I beg to differ. Before Palpatine went full space tyrant, they were actually doing okay. Turns out, a galaxy runs just fine on the promise of wealth and a decent retirement plan."
"Hmm…" Hela stepped back and watched Tony swing. She was shocked at herself, her own behavior. Normally, men or women, mortal or not, cowered before her. They dared not even look at her face. But Tony was blunt, a bit too much. She found herself liking that fact and unknowingly eased her own restrictions. "If that's the case. Suppose you wish to take over the Kree Empire. How would you do it?"
"Kree? Yeah, I've heard of them. That light-speed engine—genius work. But if memory serves, they're run by an AI, right? That's adorable. Jarvis could slip in, take over, and no one would even notice. Give it a few years, I'd tweak the system, trim the fat, and rearrange the power structure like it's furniture. Who says you need a throne to run an empire? I'd be vacationing on planets across the galaxy while secretly ruling all of it—Exciting, if you ask me."
Hela shook her head. "Without military might, a rule does not last."
"I get it. But that firepower should be keeping the peace in the empire I already run—not grabbing more. I mean, if it's all just conquest, aren't you basically doing a Thanos cosplay without the purple?"
"Thanos? You know him?" Hela asked amusedly.
"Know him, hate him, curse him. He tried to take over Earth with Loki as his little space puppet. I blew up his fleet—you're welcome—but something tells me that wasn't his grand finale. Part of why I took over my planet for building a united front. Just in case Thanos 2.0 decides to crash the party."
Hela looked at Tony with amusement. "You won against Thanos; that's a feat in itself."
"Thanks—Ha!" Tony took a shot. Far in the distance, an undead soldier summoned by Hela was gathering the golf balls. The ball hit the poor undead's head.
"Why don't you join me? Let's see if your convictions bleed truth—or just air."
Tony shrugged. "No thanks, I'm not a soldier."
"Oh, I'm not making you a soldier. A partner, perhaps—degrading as that notion is. Still, you're the first mortal to stand proud and loud before me, unflinching. Commendable. I'd enjoy watching your life… and its end."
"Ugh… Nice way of saying you'll stick around to watch me turn into a fossil. Charming. But hey, no regrets—I've got about a thousand hacks to stretch out my lifespan a few centuries. Still, where's the fun in that? A ticking clock makes every win feel like fireworks," Tony nonchalantly replied.
But he was unsure. This could be her acting. How could he trust someone like her? She had no incentives in listening to him. But he really wanted to get out of there by now. Being in space, it'd be a shame if he didn't do some exploration.
Let's just take her away from Earth.
He'd seen plenty of images in the Kree ship he had found. There were planets and even some cities in the archive.
"Alright, fine. I'll give it a shot—as long as you promise not to crash and burn and start monologuing like a budget supervillain. I need your word. No pointless conquering. I get first dibs."
"Very well. Show me how you plan to conquer a galaxy—and try not to bore me."
Hela agreed readily.
I'll take a leap of faith, I guess.
"Let's go then."
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