"Hoo boy, talk about a burst of inspiration~ Looks like it's gonna be another all-nighter, teehee~"
With a satisfied smirk and a subtle press of her cherry-tinted lips, Sayuri slid back into the driver's seat.
As for Hikigaya, his face was burning red as he sat stiffly in the passenger seat.
At that moment, the car was filled with… an indescribable scent.
"Uh, Auntie… can we get going now?"
"Alright, alright~ Auntie's starting her engine now~"
Amused by Hikigaya's obvious discomfort, Sayuri chuckled and teased,
"Teehee~ If only Hikigaya-kun could give Auntie a little help too~"
"!!"
Hikigaya jolted, instinctively glancing toward Sayuri's pale, flawless legs.
"Pretty, aren't they? Auntie's legs?" she said, beaming smugly. "Heart skipping a beat? Don't be shy~ If it's you, Auntie doesn't mind one bit~"
Hikigaya quickly looked away and took a deep breath. "Auntie… are you really in your safe days?"
His thoughts wandered back to her earlier conversation with Mrs. Yuigahama.
"Nope~ It's actually my danger zone~ Auntie's gonna have Hikigaya-kun's baby~ I'm gonna give birth to Eriri's sibling~"
"A-Auntie!" Hikigaya's eyes widened in shock.
"Ahaha~ That's the face! So cute~" Sayuri laughed until her stomach hurt. "Relax, relax~ I was just joking with your Aunt Yuigahama earlier. I am in my safe period. So~ even though what we just did was a bit reckless, it's totally fine~"
"Sayuri-san, don't play with fire like this! There's still a chance, even if it's small…"
"Well then, I'll just have the baby~ Auntie can afford to raise it, you know~ No need for child support, Hikigaya-kun~" she said with a cheeky grin.
"I…" Hikigaya was flustered and completely at a loss for words.
If Sayuri really ended up with a baby bump, how would he ever face Yukinoshita again?
"Alright, enough talk. I'll drive you home now. Buckle up just like before~"
"Auntie, seriously, stop flirting and focus on driving!" Hikigaya snapped.
"I am driving~"
"..."
What a formidable woman.
How's any ordinary man supposed to handle someone like her?
Then again…
The more high-level a woman is, the greater the thrill of taming her... Wait, what the hell am I thinking?! My girlfriend is Yukinoshita! Yukinoshita, remember that! I can't fall for Sayuri-san's seductions!
Clinging to his resolve, Hikigaya stayed silent as Sayuri dropped him off at his home a few minutes later.
Before he could even step out of the car, Sayuri casually reached over and stroked his thigh, her voice filled with mischief, "Tomorrow's Auntie is counting on you too~ Teehee~"
"Auntie, you—"
Hikigaya shuddered.
Was this going to become a daily routine?
No way.
If she came at him every day, how could anyone survive that kind of tiger?!
Sighing again and again, Hikigaya trudged home with a defeated expression.
---
This couldn't go on.
He had to find a way to conquer Sayuri-san.
But the problem was...
She wasn't someone who could be easily conquered.
Ugh. Headache.
---
Back at home.
By this time, Komachi had already gone to bed. Hikigaya decided to take a shower first and scrub off the lingering scent clinging to him—it reeked of Auntie.
"Oh right, I should check in with Kawasaki."
Thinking of that, Hikigaya pulled out his phone and gave her a call.
"Yo, Kawasaki. You home? Just got back? Mhm… cough, it's nothing urgent. Just, uh… I got the pregnancy test for you. I'll give it to you tomorrow… Eh? You want me at school early? Around six? That early? Alright, got it. I'll be there."
After hanging up, Hikigaya frowned in confusion.
"Six-thirty at school? That's when they're barely opening the gates... What's Kawasaki planning so early?"
---
The Next Day
To keep his promise to Kawasaki, Hikigaya woke up insanely early—so early he had to fix his own breakfast, since Komachi was still sleeping soundly.
He arrived at Sōbu High.
As expected.
The streets were practically deserted, not a student in sight.
After changing shoes at the locker and heading to class, Hikigaya found himself the first one there—a miracle, considering how much of a slacker he usually was.
But not long after, a figure rushed into the classroom.
It was Kawasaki.
"Morning, Kawasaki." Hikigaya greeted her with a small nod.
"M-Morning," Kawasaki replied, panting slightly. When she saw Hikigaya, she tried to compose herself, her face turning pink as she mumbled, "Sorry for making you come so early…"
"It's fine."
Hikigaya shook his head. After a quick glance around the empty classroom, he hesitated, then pulled a small box from his bag and walked over.
"Kawasaki, um… here's that thing."
"O-okay."
Blushing furiously, Kawasaki reached out her hand—
But before she could take it, her face twisted, and she clutched her stomach in panic.
"C-crap!"
"What's wrong? Your period?" Hikigaya asked, concerned.
"No, it's just... I-I can't hold it anymore..." she whispered, red-faced and mortified.
"??" Hikigaya blinked, not following.
Kawasaki explained, "I haven't… gone to the bathroom yet this morning. I've been holding it in."
"What? You haven't gone since you woke up?"
"Not yet…"
"What for?"
"Well, I heard pregnancy tests are most accurate when it's the first pee of the day…" Kawasaki's voice trailed off into a whisper, her ears flaming red with embarrassment.
"You serious?"
Hikigaya's mouth twitched. "Couldn't you have just taken it home and done it tomorrow?"
"N-no… I didn't sleep all night. I kept thinking—what if I am pregnant with your kid? How could I face Yukinoshita? I was freaking out…"
"R-right… So what now? You still wanna do the test?"
"Y-yeah. But… but…"
Her knees trembled, and she covered her face with both hands, voice cracking with panic and desperation:
"It's about to come out—what do I do, Hikigaya?! I-I'm gonna die from this...!"
"??"
Hikigaya stood there dumbfounded for several seconds before finally managing to say:
"Want me to grab a plastic bag or something?"
"HUH?!" Kawasaki's face turned beet red. She glared at him. "No way! Do you want to kill me with shame?!"