Rachel Prime sat down in her gaming chair. The multiple monitors turned on as her mulberry eyes started to glow. She rolled her eyes as she watched Sarah drive off with Elijah. She sighed then slunk into her seat, gazing up at the ceiling. Her eyes narrowed as she winced, clutching her head as her migraine intensified.
"Chill the fuck out Rachel!" Rachel Prime yelled as she closed her eyes.
Emily Prime, in her mindspace, walked toward Rachel, who was trapped behind cosmic bars made of dead stars. "Well, you settle the hell down, Rachel. You are giving me a damn headache will all your damn banging!"
Rachel's nostrils flared as she kicked the bars. "I will once you give me my damn body back you freaking weirdo!"
Emily Prime rolled her eyes and sighed. "Can't do that yet. I am trying to teach Sourpuss a lesson, and you would help him."
"Damn right I would! This isn't right...this isn't you, Em. You are becoming exactly what you don't wanna be. You can stop this," Rachel replied as she continued to kick the bars.
"Stop being dramatic," Emily Prime replied as she crossed her arms, a frown forming on her face as Rachel's words pierced through her.
"Emily, people are dying...because of what you did!"
Emily Prime's eyes lowered. "People die all the time with or without my involvement. You should be happy that I go out of my way to protect you. So shut up and settle down...I will give you your damn body back in five years," she explained then left Rachel to stew alone as she left her mindspace.
Rachel Prime shook her head, then sighed as she looked back at the monitors. Her eyes narrowed as red lights started to flicker overhead, and all her monitors turned off. The intercom situated on the wall hissed with static as it turned on.
"Emily Prime, your presence is needed at Cosmic HR," A baritone female voice echoed from the intercom.
Rachel Prime rolled her eyes. "Just send whatever paperwork to my email."
"This is not an option, Emily Prime. The Engine requests your compliance and your immediate presence at HQ. Disciplinary actions will be evaluated if you do not proceed immediately."
Rachel Prime rolled her eyes and rubbed her face, then lurched forward in her chair. "Fine!" She yelled as she jumped up and kicked her chair towards the wall, then left the room.
Rachel Prime glanced up at the stars and galaxies that surrounded her as she walked towards HQ. Its towering marble, minimalistic architecture stretched endlessly towards the heavens. Automatic doors powered by stars swung open as she stepped forward. Portraits of various galaxies, comets, and solar systems aligned the marble walls. A purple and black rug speckled with stars and planets ran down the middle, ending at a reception desk. Elevator music played in the background, sanitized of all artistic expression for corporate compliance.
The smell of the unknown and incomprehensible lingered in the air as previous gods bickered amongst themselves as they walked past her. They all wore suits made of dark matter, carrying suitcases and binders filled with various paperwork. Rachel Prime threw her hood up and rolled her eyes as they stared at her with disgust before returning to their duties.
"I'm here, let's get this over with," Rachel Prime said as she approached the receptionist desk.
The receptionist's eyebrows raised as she put her phone down. "Do you have an appointment?"
Rachel Prime rubbed her nose as she closed her eyes. "I am Emily Prime...been summoned by the CEO dipshit."
The receptionist's eyes widened as she looked down at the paperwork that cluttered her desk. "My apologies...just you look different?"
Rachel Prime nodded and rolled her eyes. "Long story, just do your job so I can leave. I hate this fucking place."
Rachel Prime winced, then grabbed her head once again as her eyes lit up.
"Um, is something wrong?"
Rachel Prime blinked, then sighed, forcing a thin lip smile. "Just roommates being roommates."
The receptionist blinked absentmindedly as her phone rang. She picked it up, then glanced with a worried expression on her face. "The board and the Engine will see you now."
"Thank the stars," Rachel Prime smiled, then approached a wormhole that was designed like an elegant modern elevator.
"You should have stayed normal, Rache....now look what I gotta do," Rachel Prime muttered to herself as she tried to tune out the elevator music as she warped. "Can't have you jumping through dimensions and manipulating time. You could had a normal fucking life but noooooo you stubborn fucking brat."
Rachel Prime's eyes twitched as she winced once more, banging her head against the elevator as she clutched her head. "Stop fucking yelling you little shit!"
The elevator door jolted open just as Rachel Prime collected herself as she rubbed her face. A minimalistic office chamber stretched endlessly in front of her. The cosmic board of directors sat around a large oval-shaped ebony table. In the middle of the table floated a mulberry triangular obelisk. Galaxies and stars lit up the room through the glass windows, reflecting their beauty and power across the vast space.
"Hey guys....wish I could say it was a pleasure....but that would be a lie," Rachel Prime said as she forced a smile on her face and sat down in the empty seat. She rocked in her seat as they all looked at her with wide eyes, shaking their heads at her.
"Do you have any idea how many fucking protocols you broke Emily!?" One rotund director shouted as he grabbed a handful of documents in front of her.
"I guess you will tell me?" Rachel Prime jested as she continued to rock in her seat.
"Multiple reality fractures in universe 472. Interference in mortal affairs, attempting to manifest in multiple universes... the list goes on."
"Hijacking mortal bodies to cook waffles!? Then you hijack a primes body and show up in her fucking body," a female director shouted with wild eyes as she stared at her paperwork. "HR is scrambling trying to come up with new documents that never existed because no previous god ever fucking done this before!"
Rachel Prime nodded with a stoic expression. "Keeps them busy."
A bald director slammed his hands on the table. "This is not a game, Emily. You are supposed to be god for 100 years, and you haven't even signed the form yet. Nobody is running the show...Reality is literally on fucking Fire because you wont do your damn job!"
"Excuse me for not wanting to be god. Nobody told me I live in a narrative multiverse, and I gotta puppeteer them. Sorry for having a conscience."
"You been stealing fucking people's bodies Emily. You already doing god shit, you delusional child!" Another director yelled, then rubbed his face. "100 years is all the Engine asks of you, and I don't know why he just won't remove your credentials."
The Obelisk hummed to life in an eerie mulberry glow. "Ⱨ₳VɆ ɎØɄ ₳ⱠⱠ ₣ØⱤ₲Ø₮₮Ɇ₦ ⱧØ₩ Đł₣₣ł₵ɄⱠ₮ ł₮ ₩₳₴ ₣ØⱤ ₳ⱠⱠ Ø₣ ɎØɄ ₩ⱧɆ₦ ł₮ ₩₳₴ ɎØɄⱤ ₮ɄⱤ₦ ₣ØⱤ ₮ⱧɆ ⱤØⱠɆ?" The Engine asked.
The Directors fell silent, then sighed. "But sir.... this is different. You had to find another Prime because of all the damage she is causing," a female director said, breaking through the silence as she grabbed some paperwork. "Like we don't even have a framework for half the shit Emily has done."
"Oh, so if there was no rule for it, then I guess I didn't break any rules. You just don't like how I am handling things." Rachel Prime interjected.
"Why won't you just do your damn job Emily?"
Rachel Prime shrugged. "Maybe I don't like the concept. Maybe I dont wanna spend eternity sitting at a table like you fucks after I am done my service. Or maybe the Engine made a mistake, and that's why it designated Rachel as Prime."
"Enough, Emily!"
Rachel Prime slammed her hands on the table. "No, because I see what is going on here. You want Rachel to be your fucking golden goose because I am damaged goods. I won't let you have her."
"That's not your fucking Rachel for the last fucking time Emily!" A tall, elderly director shouted.
"We get it, you lost everything. We did, but your grief over what happened when you ascended is rippling across multiple universes. The Engine needs a successor who is willing to do the damn job and unlike you Rachel didnt fucking break like an egg!"
Rachel Prime's eyes twitched as she looked down at the table. Her nostrils flared as her eyes grew wet, and she shook her head. "All you fuckers care about is results you never fucking try to resolve the fucking issue."
"Sir, can you just designate Rachel as the successor, please?" a director pleaded, looking up at the obelisk.
"ł ₵₳₦ ₦Ø₮ ĐØ ₮Ⱨ₳₮ ₣ØⱤ ₮Ⱨ₳₮ ₩łⱠⱠ ₦Ø₮ Ø₦ⱠɎ ₱ⱤØVɆ Ɇ₥łⱠɎ'₴ ₱Øł₦₮ ฿Ʉ₮ ł₮ ₩łⱠⱠ ĐɆV₳ⱠɄɆ Ɽ₳₵ⱧɆⱠ'₴ ₴₳₵Ɽł₣ł₵Ɇ."
Rachel Prime slammed her hands on the desk. "At least the Engine gets it! The only problem is that the Engine doesn't even know how to fix me!"
"So what... we just going to hope everything resolves on its own?"
"₳ⱠⱠ ₩łⱠⱠ ฿Ɇ ⱤɆ₴ØⱠVɆĐ ₦₳₮ɄⱤ₳ⱠⱠɎ. ₦Ø ĐłⱤɆ₵₮ ł₦₮ɆⱤVɆ₦₮łØ₦ ł₴ ⱤɆQɄłⱤɆĐ; ₮ⱧɆ ₱ⱤØ₵Ɇ₴₴ ł₴ ₳ⱠⱤɆ₳ĐɎ ł₦ ₥Ø₮łØ₦," The Engine hummed.
Rachel Prime scoffed then shook her head. "So can I leave now?"
"ɎɆ₴."
"But?"
"You heard the Engine. All will be resolved naturally. See you never assholes," Rachel Prime jested as she threw her hood up and left the room.
Rachel Prime returned to her monitoring room, turning on the screens as she plopped back down in her chair. She frowned as tears dripped from her face as she cried uncontrollably.