I don't seem to get a grip on my own actions.
Tell any normal—sane—person that twelve hours ago, I had a friend die in my arms. Now I'm having vent-sex banter with the walking brand logo of the pharmaceutical world.
And all while being held by a man who collects omega body parts like trophies—in jars—in his basement.
Taxidermy shouldn't be hot, but maybe that was the gas talking. Or the adrenaline. Or just how fucking drained I am—body, mind, soul.
The result was the same. I passed out.
Never faint. That was the rule. The only one I had left.
And I broke it.
I don't even remember the moment my brain gave up. Just Killian's voice—low, breathy, moaning my name like it meant something.
I miss him.
Maybe because he was the last thing I controlled before I became someone's plaything.
I remember kissing him.
Sloppy. Messy. Raw.
Not my first kiss that week. But the first alpha to kiss me since college.
I tell myself pheromones are bullshit. That pleasure is the same, omega or alpha—just chemicals.
But that kiss…
That pathetic, animal kiss made me shake. No omega ever made me shake like that.
And I hate that. I fucking hate that.
I am cold.
My body remembers this kind of cold.
I wake to the cold metal beneath my back. Naked. Gagged. Tied up tighter than a goddamn roast.
Fuck. Emiliano's foreplaying again.
I want to make a necessary comment about his flirting lack of skill, but I can't.
Not because I'm afraid.
Or I am cautious about not making this worse than it is.
He just gagged me.
Literally.
I have a ball in my mouth secured by some type of anesthetic mask.
The mask over my mouth tastes like anesthetic and latex. Sweet and sterile.
That combined with the fact I'm more tied up than a beef tenderloin confirms yet again what I already knew.
Emiliano's a freak.
But I digress.
Because there was yet another similarity between me and that tenderloin. And it wasn't the fact that we're both tender and we melt in someone's mouth if prepared well.
It was in fact, the point we were both cooked.
"You're up"
Bad choice of words.
"I know it's a bit different from our usual marital life, but I'm sure you'll find in your heart to forgive me."
I really wish looks could kill at this moment.
" You're really charming when you get mad, dear wifey, but let me explain why you're in this situation. Your flower is about to shrivel up and die. And that's no good."
Huh?
What the hell is he talking about?
My flower is fine.
Right?
"Don't look so confused. I must admit that I tampered a bit with it. I gave you some alpha pheromones to stabilize it and some tranquilizers so you can stand the pain. Seems like I've grown attached to you, huh?"
How generous of him.
I'm moved.
"Luther"
I don't like the way he said my name.
Last time he talked this - softly I was left to starve for a week.
"You have no idea how special you are, do you?"
Well, I am the youngest Minister of the Parliament. My father is the Prime Minister. I am the one who passed the law for free inhibitors and heat suppressants for all alphas and omegas.
Also, I am drop-dead gorgeous.
But I have a feeling this is not what it is about.
" Did your parents tell you a bit about your flower?"
Ugh.
So this is about the fact that I'm an illegal.
So what?
I am already not reproducing with any alpha even without being locked up and left to die. Or my family losing its prestige.
Even if I wanted to, I can't.
My smell alone can kill any alpha around me.
Except Emiliano.
I wonder why.
"Your flower is an extremely rare belladonna- an Atropa baetica. A wild type."
Botany lessons? While my ass is airing out?
How romantic.
"Don't roll your eyes. I need to monitor your state. I might inject too much substance if you play around this much"
I wish I could gulp.
Creep.
"How could you be so loud and interruptive even gagged?!"
A born skill.
"Let me finish. You need to know this. I'm already making your father my enemy. This will break your bond forever."
What bond?
And how is Emiliano involved with my dad?
Can he dumb it down for me already?
If he keeps edging me this much, I can't cum- come to a conclusion, I mean.
"Your flower makes your blood poisonous. And infectious. You see, if I were to mix your blood with the blood of a weed omega, the omega would instantly become toxic. High toxicity too. If he survives, of course. After all, the poison will replace the blood in his system and not all bodies can handle that."
Huh?
What is he babbling about?
"The same drop of your blood can instantly kill any alpha if ingested or contacted with an open wound."
So why didn't kill you?
He must have noticed my skeptical look.
"I am not an alpha, Luther. That's why it doesn't work on me."
But he's not a beta or an omega either.
What is he then?
Emiliano sat down on a chair in front of me. He ruffled his hair anxiously. Bit his lip, contemplating if he should confess whatever he thought or not.
And maybe it's because I keep inhaling rut alpha pheromones, but that is so fucking hot.
If I weren't gagged, I'd say something cruel. To him. To myself. For liking the way he looked just now.
"I was an omega. A poisonous one. Not at your level, of course, but still. Enough to be a problem. I was-"
A pause.
A moment.
Regret. Sadness. Betrayal.
Just a small crack in Emiliano's mask.
I don't think anyone else has seen it before.
"I am an artificial alpha. A superior race, if you may. Pheromones strong enough to kill alphas if given a couple of minutes. Pheromones strong enough to make an omega go into heat. I am a survivor, Luther. More than that, I am a god."
Ugh.
Narcissistic much?
"I will be one soon is what I mean. You, Luther, are my secret card. Your blood is all I need. I am planning an apocalypse, you see? The world as it is now is a mess, a prison. Weeds are dying on streets, used and disposed of after being used by alphas. Society is too obsessed with the power of alphas to hold them accountable for their actions"
He's not wrong, but what can you do?
It's been only a few generations since the second gender modification appeared. Humans adapt slowly.
Step by step, it would get better.
At least, that's the hope I cling to.
"If we transform all omegas into poisonous ones, the alpha royalty will end. They would be forced into respecting what -no- means."
So you want to switch the power play?
Then what?
It's not a guarantee that omegas would be better, that they would not use their power to abuse the weaker. Humans tend to be ruthless no matter their gender if they come across power.
"Now, to let the alphas experience what suppression means is indeed a revenge that's appealing, but."
A pause.
So dramatic just so you can be an alphaphobe?
Pathetic.
"It's not what I want. I want equality. So I made a drug. It erases all pheromones, except the ones an omega release in major cases of stress and anxiety."
So they can defend themselves just when the situation calls for it.
Sounds too good to be true.
"The only downside of this paradise we're about to create is that only a handful will survive."
Ah, that's it. The evil part.
I was expecting the punchline. It didn't disappoint.
"You're not impressed."
Not at all.
"It's fine"
He theatrically signed.
"I was up to let you stay by my side as my partner over paradise. But it's fine. I can use you just as a blood bank too. It doesn't really matter to me."
He got up from his chair and grabbed a phosphorescent syringe from a table.
Stabbed my arm with it.
It hurts so badly. And I can see it spreading through my body.
It conquers every vein, every blood vessel in my body, making them glow green under my skin.
I wanna scratch myself.
The bugs.
The bugs are back, eating me from the inside.
Chewing me alive, rotting my scoops.
Help.
Please, help.
"Such a shame, Luther. You made a lovely housewife."