Lockhart.
...
Sorry if I didn't give much attention to the novels this week. There were many family birthdays, so I had to make an appearance. Haha.
...….
Today, at Flourish and Blotts...
Located on the north side of the Magical Street, Flourish and Blotts is a place of living history: it opened its doors in 1654 and has since been the favorite destination of generations of Hogwarts students seeking their textbooks. With shelves that rise up to touch the ceiling and aisles so narrow one could get lost between mountains of dusty grimoires, the shop also accepts owl orders"a very useful convenience... on normal days.
But today is not a normal day.
Today, the store has turned into a boiling pot of excitement, barely contained screams, and sharpened nerves. Outside, a line of women "and a few men with faces of utter resignation" stretches along the sidewalk. From their expressions, it's clear they're not there by choice, but rather fulfilling a mission... a dangerous and annoying mission: accompanying their wives to the highly anticipated book signing of Gilderoy Lockhart, who is also promoting his new book titled How I Turned a Goblin into My Slave.
Yes. That Gilderoy Lockhart.
The housewives are more excited than the last time a book of his came out, when they didn't even get a chance to see him in person. This time, however, the magical Adonis himself would be there, smiling and ready to sign anything put in front of him. That's why many of these women had camped out hours before the shop opened.
The Ministry, foreseeing a potential disaster, sent several Aurors to reinforce security. It was no exaggeration: placing dozens of witches and wizards armed with wands and overflowing passions in the same enclosed space... was practically summoning chaos.
Inside the store, Wanda stood alongside Loise and Chelsea, watching the nervous crowd. Chelsea, normally haughty and arrogant, was swaying side to side like a love-struck schoolgirl, eyes locked on the entrance with barely contained anticipation.
"Wanda, remember," said Loise in a serious tone, "once Lockhart arrives, you need to make sure no one skips the line. Last time, we had a pretty nasty fight between housewives. Actually, every time Lockhart shows up, there's an incident: furious husbands, jealous men trying to punch him only to be stopped by a wave of hysterical women, or pure-bloods trying to use their status to jump ahead."
"It's fine, don't worry. I can handle it," Wanda replied with a confident smile, spinning her wand lightly between her fingers.
"There he is! There he is!" Chelsea screamed, practically jumping with excitement.
Suddenly, everything froze. Heads turned in unison toward the front door. The air seemed to hold its breath.
There, standing with rehearsed theatricality down to the last detail, was Gilderoy Lockhart. His purple velvet robes shimmered under the magical lights, his golden, perfectly waved hair danced gently in the air, and his blue eyes sparkled as if enchanted themselves. With a practiced smile"the third one, "charming smile for fan-filled events," according to his own notes"he greeted the crowd with a slight bow.
"It is such a pleasure to see so many fans of me, Gilderoy Lockhart. That makes me very, very happy!" he proclaimed in a clear, musical voice.
Several sighs rippled through the air like a wave. Two women fainted. Others cried openly.
"They say his smile has been nominated again as the most charming by Witch Weekly," whispered a witch clutching three books to her chest.
Lockhart widened his smile, as if rehearsed for that exact comment. He walked toward the signing table with a slow yet elegant gait, greeting people like royalty during a procession.
"Ladies," he said in a syrupy voice, looking at Loise, Chelsea... and pausing briefly on Wanda, to whom he gave his brightest smile. "It will be a pleasure working with you."
He sat down, surrounded by a table full of portraits of himself in various dramatic poses: facing trolls, winking on a broomstick, or holding up a fake basilisk fang.
"Let's begin, shall we? We wouldn't want to keep my dear admirers waiting."
And then"chaos.
Women surged toward the table as if their lives depended on it, waving books, scrolls, and even articles of clothing"underwear included"for Lockhart to sign.
Wanda turned away in disgust, just as one woman waved a lacy bra in front of the author's face.
"Please! Respect the line or you'll be expelled from the bookstore!" Loise bellowed, her voice cutting through the uproar.
Meanwhile, Chelsea had taken position beside Lockhart, staring at him so intensely that even the author"accustomed to harassment"looked slightly uncomfortable.
"Same old story..." muttered Loise under her breath, eyeing Chelsea with a look of irritation. "You've no idea how badly I want to fire her..."
Outside the store, two temporary employees"young wizards with dark circles under their eyes"struggled to hold back the swelling crowd pushing against the glass doors.
Inside, Wanda elegantly drew her wand and, with a slight flick, levitated backward a woman who had tried to cut the line. She didn't really need to use the wand, but it was better than letting it gather dust in her pocket.
The witch shot her a venomous glare, but seeing the line move forward, she grumbled and returned to her place.
"Wanda!" a familiar voice called from the entrance.
Turning around, Wanda saw Susan, Harry, and Hermione in line, all smiling"though the pile of Lockhart books in Susan's arms betrayed any innocent intentions.
"Hi! I brought them to have some fun," Susan said cheerfully.
Wanda sighed.
Yes, this definitely wasn't a normal day.
"Mum!" Harry said with a big smile, running up to hug her. She ruffled his hair with natural tenderness, letting out a soft laugh.
"That's odd… I didn't see you in the line earlier," Wanda remarked curiously, raising an eyebrow. After all, Susan and the kids were already inside the shop, and the line stretched all the way back to the entrance of Diagon Alley.
"Don't say anything, but… we paid a guy to stand in line for us. My idea," Harry whispered proudly, as if he had masterminded an undercover Auror-level operation.
Hermione approached, looking slightly offended.
"Even though I still think it's dishonest… it's better than waiting two hours in the sun," she muttered, crossing her arms"but without much conviction.
"Alright. You can go read some books in the store if you don't want to stand in line with your poor mother and aunt," Susan said, putting on a theatrically tragic face.
"Okay," both kids answered in unison, completely ignoring her dramatic act as they disappeared into the aisles without a care.
"Raise ravens and they'll peck your eyes out," Susan sighed exaggeratedly, prompting a soft laugh from Wanda. Seeing the towering stack of books her friend was carrying, Wanda pulled out her wand and cast a lightening charm. The books began to float gracefully, as if they were feathers.
"If you need anything, just let me know. I'll be helping the others," Wanda said with a serene smile.
"Alright, I'm not going anywhere," Susan replied, adjusting the charmed books.
Wanda stepped back into the shop with determined steps. With a quick glance, she located Harry and Hermione browsing peacefully through some books. However, the moment she looked toward the crowd, her expression changed.
Something was wrong.
She felt that unsettling sensation. Like someone was staring too intently. She followed the trail of that gaze and saw him: Lockhart. The charming, arrogant, and falsely heroic Gilderoy Lockhart. His expression had shifted.
He was no longer smiling gallantly at the crowd. Now he was watching Harry with narrowed eyes"first in confusion, then with sudden recognition, and finally… with a glint of barely concealed greed.
"Well, if it isn't the young savior, Harry Potter!" Lockhart exclaimed theatrically, his voice slicing through the murmur of the store like a lightning bolt. Everyone fell silent, wide-eyed, as the wizard strutted toward the boy with feigned elegance.
Harry and Hermione turned around, puzzled.
Hermione, when her mother bought her Lockhart's books, had been swept away by the stories"adventure, courage, monsters, mysteries... all worthy of admiration. But Wanda"the most powerful witch she knew"had always treated him like a fraud. And over time, Hermione began to see it too. Inconsistencies in his tales, fighting styles that changed from book to book, mistakes no real expert would make. Wanda had put it bluntly: "They seem less like autobiographies… and more like fantasy tales."
So now, seeing him approach in person, even if he was still handsome, something felt off. Very off. Hermione instinctively tensed, ready to act if anything happened.
Harry, on the other hand, was just confused. A famous adult speaking directly to him? Well… it wouldn't be the first time. What he didn't know was that Wanda always kept protective charms on him. Spells that would react to bad intentions"even if she wasn't around.
And just as Lockhart placed a hand on Harry's shoulder…
BOOM!
An invisible magical explosion blasted him into the air as if a hippogriff had charged him. The bestselling author crashed flat on his back into his own giant poster, which had been smiling charmingly... and now seemed to mock him.
Of course, the poster was protected with anti-dirt, anti-theft, and anti-damage enchantments"Lockhart had his priorities"so the impact was loud but not particularly harmful.
Wanda narrowed her eyes.
Harry's protective spell had activated. It didn't do so lightly"it assessed the intent behind physical contact and responded according to the threat. And if it had reacted like this… Lockhart's thoughts were far from pure.
Silence reigned for a few eternal seconds.
Then, as if nothing had happened, Lockhart's eyes snapped open and he leapt to his feet, brushing off his robes with a forced chuckle.
"Great defensive spell, Harry! Very impressive. I see you're a fan of my books! Just as I said in Voyages with Vampires: 'No matter how charming the smile of the one approaching… never let them touch you. They could be an enemy… or a vampire hungry for your blood!'"
The silence was replaced by a thunderous round of applause. Fans squealed with excitement, enchanted by his "graceful recovery."
Meanwhile, Harry and Hermione exchanged looks of utter confusion.
"…What the heck just happened?" Harry murmured.
Hermione didn't answer. She kept her eyes on Lockhart, who was already strolling back to his spot as if the whole thing had been part of a grand performance.
And Wanda, watching from a corner, clicked her tongue.
"Clown…" she muttered under her breath, still keeping watch.
Because if life had taught her anything…
It was that those who smile too much are usually the ones hiding their fangs best.