The ability bestowed upon Benjamin was humbling. The first realization he had from gaining such an immense amount of power was how weak he had been before. He had been told severally that he was weak, but only now did he realize just how true those remarks were.
When his ability as a portal maker first manifested, he was branded a prodigy. One who could transverse space with ease. He was young when he discovered his power, so when he couldn't do all that portal makers could do, no one thought it odd.
'He is still young', they said, 'He will grow and so will his power.' Benjamin , on his part, didn't question their assertation. All his young life, he was an acknowledged genius. But then, they moved. Benjamin's father had him make a portal into another realm but his mother stayed behind. He didn't get to choose to stay with her and the former realm, his former home, was lost to him forever. Benjamin never fully forgave his father this wrong.
The new realm they went into was a realm of war and warriors and Benjamin never quite felt at home there. In this new realm, the children were trained from youth to become warriors and Benjamin, the young genius quickly became branded as a dolt. Benjamin was instructed by his father to conceal his ability. Mr. Arthur also hid his, he claimed instead to have the ability of wiping memories, thinking that this would help him keep a low profile. But even his reduced ability was considered a threat to his new neighbours. He was monitored closely and trusted by none.
Benjamin could feel it too, the distrust. He, too, was watched and marked as an outsider. It was not uncommon for the abilities of faeries to materialize only when they were older, in young adulthood, so his inability to use his abilities wasn't viewed with suspicion. Benjamin was however, still viewed as an exception because among faeries, an individual's ability could be checked although it hadn't manifested. His instructors tried several times to check his ability, but always drew up a blank. Arthur's ability, block prevented them from seeing a thing.
Only two conclusions can be drawn when a faerie's ability is hidden, either his ability was so weak that it could not be detected, or he had none. Since abilities were inherited, the fact that his father had one proved that he must have one as well, therefore he was rebranded as the unfortunate untalented outsider.
Benjamin was too young to understand that this was because of his father, as such, he began to psychologically limit himself to what those people thought about him. This led to a riddling inferiority complex, resulting in Benjamin always trying to prove himself, he couldn't consolidate the experience he had earlier in his childhood with the experiences he was having now, and he missed his mother more than he had ever done.
Benjamin's mother never pressured him about his ability, she never told him that she expected much from him. She saw him the way only a mother could, not as a genius or a prodigy but as her son. Benjamin felt his father only saw him as a weapon, a tool to be used in accomplishing something. But Benjamin had no idea what the goal his father so desired was.
In time, Benjamin adjusted to the new location and made a friend. Another newcomer, just like him, whose ability had never materialized. Scott was usually dead last, unable to beat even Benjamin, who followed immediately after. His weakness led Benjamin to develop new strength to protect him. In combat, Benjamin would usually cover for him and even go so far as to sacrifice himself to ensure Scott passed.
The instructors were displeased with this behaviour as it would limit Scott's growth, causing him to depend on Benjamin. They foresaw that allowing their friendship to develop may cause Scott to become useless in a real battle. In order to avoid this, they separated them and, on some occasions, pitted them against each other in combat.
After one such occasion, on a snowy day, Scott asked Benjamin to dissolve the friendship.
'Our friendship cannot continue. It is causing you nothing but trouble.' Scott had tried to persuade him, but Benjamin shrugged off his concerns.
'It's not just bad for you. It's also bad for me. What will I do in combat? There's no way I can survive. Let's face it, I'm deadweight. I'll be dead before the battle even begins, and you will be too if you keep this up' Scott tried to say nonchalantly as though the thought of his death didn't scare him. In reality, it did. Since the rumour that a war with the blue portal lord was imminent started spreading, Scott had gone nights without sleep.
'Scott, I don't know what you're so afraid of. I'll protect you, like I always have.' Benjamin replied, without a trace of fear in his words.
'How?' Scott asked, his fear rising. 'We're both powerless, Benjamin. How do you want to fight a portal master?' Scott's voice was shaking.
Benjamin turned in shock, he had never seen his friend like this. Scott was the flippant type; the concept of weightier matters, such as pride and honour, had no hold on him, so Benjamin had assumed that fear would also elude his jolly friend. But here he was, so crippled with fear that his voice shook and his merry eyes bore a grave look.
'Benjamin, promise me that in battle, you will look after yourself and yourself alone. I will not let my incompetence be responsible for your death as well as mine.' Scott said gravely. His chin set.
Benjamin searched the grim facial expression of his now unrecognizable friend, then laughed.
'I didn't know you could make such a face', he said, ignoring his friend's demand.
'Benjamin!' Scott interjected angrily.
'Scott, there's no need to worry. I know you think I'm just some powerless sod who can barely protect himself much less another but I'm not. I am actually capable of handling combat, I assure you.' Benjamin replied.
'What do you mean?' Scott asked. Benjamin turned to him and in that moment, made a decision that would forever alter the course of his life.
'Scott, how long have we known each other?' He asked, then proceeded to tell Scott his entire history, sparing no detail, including his ability, revealing that he was a portal maker.
'You expect me to believe that?' Scott asked when Benjamin was done.
Instead of explaining more in words, Benjamin simply opened a portal and brought a fish from the depths of the ocean to dry land. Scott gazed at the flopping fish in amazement, it was a species that was rarely seen as it inhabited the deepest depths of the ocean. Scott turned his gaze to his best friend of eight years.
'I can't believe you kept this from me all these years,' he finally said. 'Do you realize how much trouble we could have avoided if you had just told me earlier? What were you afraid of?' Scott was so much hurt by the secret as he was by all the missed opportunities because of it.
'You can't breathe a word of this to anyone, do you understand me? It's not safe. My father has ways of knowing.' Benjamin said gravely.
Scott stopped his shocked venting for the moment, then agreed.
'Don't worry, your secret's safe with me.' Scott promised with a smile of relief. They walked home the rest of the way together, both feeling a little warmer.
The next day, Arthur asked for a portal to be made to another domain. It was the first time since they arrived that his father had made such a wish so Benjamin was worried but when his father left without a word and came back shortly after, he shrugged it off as a result of the war and not his actions of the former day.
The rumours of war were confirmed, and the trainees started preparing for battle. It was going to be a fierce war, even for the veterans, so every measure for preparation was taken. Trainees were assigned platoons, and efforts went towards preparation for an all-out war that was to occur within the week.
However, on the day of the war, Arthur, Benjamin's father, demanded that Benjamin create a portal in their house, leading to the Lilac portal master's domain. The same domain he had gone to not so long ago. Benjamin concurred, although such a portal would be a drain on him while in battle, he had no choice.
On the battlefield, Benjamin fought valiantly for his age, even without powers. But in the heat of the battle, a creature appeared. It had black hair and a scroll which glowed. A purple effervescence seemed to emanate from her. When she spoke, it shook the entire battlefield. Benjamin could not hear what she said, but watched with horror as giant golden creatures captured and dragged members of the royal family into oblivion. The entire battlefield was thrown into chaos, and Scott, who had been fighting by his side, fled in fear. Benjamin struggled to run after him, only to see him thrust through in the confusion. He cried in agony and rushed blindly to Scott's side when his father, who had disappeared since the beginning of the fight, came and held him back, stopping him from reaching Scott.
Simon, the son of Lord Basileus' advisor, stepped in and used his ability on Scott. Benjamin watched, captive in his father's arms, as Scott was dragged off into oblivion in the place of the prince of the rebellion, Basileus' son.
The next thing Benjamin remembers after this is waking up on the floor of their new house, in the domain of Lilac of the portal lords. His father sat on the arm of a couch opposite him. As he came to understand his whereabouts, it slowly became clear to him. Why else would Lilac of the portal lords appear on their battlefield? His father had planned to flee from the domain of the blue portal master and had betrayed the rebellion in exchange for safe passage.
Benjamin could not believe his father would stoop so low, he stared at his father in shock. Arthur stared back unremorsefully.
'Everything I've done, son, I've done for you,' was his only explanation.
Only then did Benjamin remember that Arthur's first visit to this domain had taken place after he had told Scott his gift. He glanced back at his father in shock, realizing that everything that was happening was a result of his actions.
'Did you really think I wouldn't find out?' Arthur asked, then moved on to begin unpacking their belongings in the apartment. Benjamin stayed on the floor, staring at his feet.
Days flowed into months, and Benjamin acclimatized to this domain much faster than he did the last. It felt more like home. The peaceful atmosphere, the people, the faeries who were unaware of their heritage, living in sweet oblivion all pulled Benjamin deeper into this impossible dream. Benjamin understood the difference between a domain with a rebellion and one without. He even made new friends, one of whom was Pearl.
Benjamin found it difficult to blend in at first. For one, he was unfamiliar with the amount of leisure time he had, and then there was the issue of hiding his scars and dulling his heightened senses and reflexes, but he managed to fit in somehow. He was beginning to forget his old life until one day, when his father told him to make a portal.
'We're expecting visitors' was Arthur's remark, but the shifty look in his eyes convinced Benjamin that there was more to it than that.
Benjamin was not allowed to participate in the meeting, but from a hidden position, he eavesdropped on the entire conversation. While he couldn't hear all that was said, he was able to make out most of it. Arthur was being tried for treason. There was no solid evidence, but in matters of this nature, an unconfirmed rumour was enough for someone to lose his head.
In the end, Arthur had to strike a deal; the details of it were unclear to Benjamin, but it involved weakening and invading this portal, upturning the balance by subjecting the portal lord to punishment from a law she would be forced to break. Benjamin understood perfectly, his father was being blackmailed.
After that day, Arthur changed again. His attitude which had progressively improved since coming to Lilac's domain, took a nosedive. Until one day, Benjamin found himself on the other side of a portal leading from their house to a burning house, and he was sure that his father had started the fire. Benjamin's father had informed him that he was going on an important mission; Benjamin was not to interfere, but he couldn't stand by and watch, especially when he recognized the burning house as the home of Pearl's cousin.
Before Benjamin knew it, he sprang into action. He created a portal to the river, connecting it to the burning house and dumped water all over the house, putting out the fire. He sucked back the excess water into the river to avoid flooding the house and surrounding area.
Benjamin focused solely on this task, and the portal he opened for his father closed up as a result. He rushed to the location of the burning house in a panic, afraid for his father, who was now trapped without an escape portal. On his way, he found Ophelia, Pearl's cousin, lying unconscious beside the river. She was completely soaked. When he returned the excess water back to the river, he had pulled in her too. Fearing what may happen to her if left alone, he made a portal to Pearl's bed for her and laid her to rest.
After ensuring her safety, he continued running to where his father was, conserving his energy to make a portal for his father and fight if the need arose. However, when he got to the location of the burning house, he did not see his father. All he saw was the shell of a house, the destruction caused by his father.
Benjamin looked around, the house was completely empty. He was about to leave when he heard a pitiful wail. He followed the direction of the sound to find a baby in its pyjamas, weeping on the floor. The sight devastated Benjamin on the inside because he knew that his own father had forever altered the course of this child's life. He carried the baby in his arms and rocked it till it stopped crying. Suppressing his own tears at the man his father had become, he walked silently home.
When he got home, Benjamin felt so relieved that his father had survived the mission unscathed that he ran to hug him in spite of his feelings. At the end of the day, Arthur was all he had. Arthur carried the baby from his arms and put him to rest on a bed. He came back and, without any warning, wiped Benjamin's mind clear of any unpleasant memory. This was how Benjamin, the library assistant, who had lived and worked in this town, was born.
Arthur would only unlock Benjamin's memories at pivotal moments, and even then, only fragments of them, the pieces necessary for the given task, locking others as he pleased. To ensure that the version of Benjamin was the version they needed.
Only now, for the first time since then, was Benjamin really, truly awake.