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---
Following the markers on the map,
Chishiya arrived alone in the deeper part of the forest.
He looked around.
There was no detailed information on the slime cluster in the commission.
"Is this really the place?"
Just as Chishiya was questioning things,
a strange sound echoed from deeper in the woods.
"Come… come on—!"
"No… you're welcome…"
Chishiya: "???"
...What the hell?
Is this how kids are playing in the woods these days?
Tch. Focus, Chishiya. Positive energy.
"..."
After two cautious steps forward, he paused.
"Should I really be investigating this? I mean…"
He pushed aside the bushes.
Instant regret.
There, in a small clearing,
a blonde woman in full armor was surrounded by slimes.
Her sword had been tossed aside.
She stood there… visibly enjoying herself.
"Ah~"
Rustle...
She heard the leaves moving behind her.
Darkness turned around and locked eyes with Chishiya.
"…"
The silence was deafening.
Darkness: "???"
"EHHHHHHHHHHHH——?!!"
Her face turned beet red.
She scrambled for her sword.
"You… you vile slime scum! Y-you dare use illusions on me?!"
"Take… take this!"
She swung her sword at the nearest slime.
Three minutes passed.
She hadn't landed a single hit.
"Haa… haa… haa…"
Darkness panted, gripping her sword tightly.
Her eyes kept flicking to Chishiya from the corner of her vision.
So humiliating…
So shameful…
So utterly disgraceful...
...but also… kind of thrilling.
Just as her thoughts were spiraling.
The surrounding slimes suddenly fused together.
In the blink of an eye, they became a giant slime.
Its tentacles wrapped around her armor-clad body.
Too shameful!
To be seen like this!
And yet… what comes next...?
Hehe… hehehe…
Darkness stifled a smile, her mind entering full delusion mode.
Chishiya's system interface popped up.
---
[Name: Darkness]
[Recruitable Employee]
[Recruitment Rewards:]
1. Knight's Body: Greatly enhances host's physical defense.
2. Kingdom Nobility: Increases profit margin by 25% when dealing with noble clients.
---
Recruitable…
But…
Chishiya stared at the woman who was literally basking in her tentacle-fueled humiliation.
Nope. Not a chance.
This woman is beyond help.
Still, to stop this from getting any weirder, Chishiya finally stepped in.
"Freeze."
In an instant, the slime froze solid.
It shattered to pieces on the ground.
Darkness blinked.
"Huh?"
Almost disappointed.
But with Chishiya still standing there, she held back.
"Ahem…"
"Thanks for the help…"
Darkness cleared her throat.
"I was… under an illusion, that's all."
"These slimes are really crafty..."
"..."
Chishiya said nothing.
Illusions? From slimes?
God-tier mental gymnastics.
Darkness gave him a grateful bow.
"Anyway, thank you again."
Chishiya waved dismissively.
"No big deal."
Darkness studied him curiously.
Simple clothes. Average gear.
But…
Way too good-looking. Not her type.
She preferred the kind of guy who was totally useless, muttering bitterly about society while hitting himself with an empty bottle.
A hopeless man forced to work just to survive.
Someone like…
That perverted shopkeeper who sold cursed goods.
Yes… yes… he was just right.
Darkness flushed red, already imagining his greasy face in her mind.
"Since you're okay now, I'll be heading out."
Chishiya turned around.
That giant slime earlier was likely the source of the disturbance.
With that dealt with, he could get back to his real job—selling products.
"Please wait!"
Darkness called out to him.
"May I ask your name? I want to properly thank you later."
"Chishiya."
With that, he turned and left.
Recruitment could wait.
He already had more than enough unmanageable weirdos in his company.
---
Back at the Guild counter
Chishiya reported his findings to Miss Luna.
Luna nodded and returned the commission slip.
"Alright, Chishiya-san. Once it's confirmed, the reward will be transferred to your account."
Chishiya nodded.
He checked the time.
Almost time to open shop.
He was about to leave when.
BEEEEP!
A sharp alarm blared through the Guild.
Urgent notice! Urgent notice!
All adventurers, please arm yourselves and gather at the town gates!
Repeat: All adventurers, to the front gates! Immediately!
"What the hell's going on?"
The Guild broke into chaos.
Everyone rushed toward the entrance.
There, they found—
A massive, purple-black slime.
It gurgled and burbled as toxic bubbles rose from its body.
It spewed foul gas and noxious mist with every pulse.
Standing before it was—
A blonde crusader.
Chishiya: "?"
He stared blankly.
Why…
Why did he immediately feel like this was somehow Darkness's fault?
Then someone shouted.
"Wait… isn't that a Demon King Army officer?!"
"Poison Slime Hans!"
"Why is he here—?!"
---
Outside the town
Hans, the toxic slime officer, was on the verge of a breakdown.
Damn it!
Dealing with Axis cultists in Water City was already bad enough.
Now he was assigned to Axel… and ran into this nightmare!
Vanir had gone missing in Axel, so Hans was sent by the Demon King to investigate.
And today, while chilling in the woods,
this lunatic knight jumped out of nowhere.
Claimed he "reeked of evil" and challenged him to a duel on the spot.
And the worst part?
His poison didn't work on her.
Even after full exposure,
she didn't collapse.
She got excited.
She even started saying weird crap with a flushed face.
Hans: A complete psychopath—!!!
Darkness, now covered in toxic slime,
bit her lip, cheeks flushed red.
"I… I won't let you hurt the people of Axel!"
Hans's eye twitched uncontrollably.
"Lady. You're insane."
"I told you already!"
"I'm not interested in the rookie adventurers here!"
"Do you not understand human language?!"
Darkness narrowed her eyes.
"How can I trust the words of a Demon King officer?"
"You must have some twisted motive."
"For example…"
"Poisoning me… and then fulfilling your sick fantasies!"
"Your eyes… they're totally giving it away!"
Hans: "You're insane!?!?"
"Stop saying things that'll ruin my reputation!"
Darkness ignored him completely. "Quit pretending—!"
Hans: "???"
"You're trying to corrupt me with your poison, aren't you?"
Hans: "???"
"Or maybe you want to do something even more depraved?!"
Hans: "Wait, what—"
"She's definitely a hopelessly evil monster."
Hans: "I'M THE MONSTER?!"
"COME ON! COME AT ME! H-H-HAAH… I WON'T GIVE IN TO YOU!"
(To be continued.)
***
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