When Lana declared that she intended to reveal everything she knew to Lillie, the other two girls and one cat present all looked utterly shocked.
They looked exactly like Yu-Gi-Oh! players hearing that the Tearlaments and the entire Vernusylph family just got unbanned.
"Lana, are you really going through with this?"
"I get that you might be feeling guilty toward Lillie, but…"
"If you dump all that stuff on her in one go, there's no way she'll be able to take it, right?"
At that moment, Haru couldn't even bring himself to think about just how much chaos and nonsense he'd kept hidden from Lillie.
If all those "plays" were turned into a doujin, it'd easily span over a thousand pages.
If Lillie found out about any of it, she'd probably ask, "Was I part of your 'play' too?"—and then have Nebby blast him with a Moongeist Beam out of pure spite.
"Yeah, yeah! I mean, look at me—I just did a couple of little experiments, but once they piled up, Master couldn't take it anymore!"
"See, it proves that striking at the vital point right away isn't the way to go! You gotta take it slow and steady!"
"Otherwise, Master might end up getting punished too, you know?"
"Though I guess that sweet, gentle Miss Lillie probably wouldn't do anything that outrageous."
"Then again… what's that human saying again? 'Nice guys should be staring down the barrel of a gun,' or something like that?"
As she said that, Mew's face turned red with a strange kind of blush.
Getting held at gunpoint… Master's gun, maybe? Would he aim at her face, or somewhere else? Fascinating.
As weird as it was, Haru had a nagging feeling that Mew was actually looking forward to this "punishment" thing.
This cat had gotten weirder and weirder lately. Even Haru had no idea what went on inside her head anymore.
Iono didn't say a word—she just slowly nodded, agreeing with the other two.
However, inwardly, she was already planning when and how to extract Haru from this hellhole.
She'd only been in Alola for two days and had already witnessed more walking disasters than she could count. Clearly, this region was a breeding ground for tragic waifus and questionable choices.
If Haru stayed in this insane place any longer, he'd get wrung out from Haru into Hollow-Haru in no time.
Really, Paldea was where it was at—none of this clingy-girl or minefield stuff.
As for poor Lillie… all Iono could do was wish her the best of luck.
But Lana simply gave them a look and answered calmly: "You all make good points."
"But I refuse."
"Why?"
Haru grew increasingly confused.
"Didn't you guys say before that it's best to reveal the 'truth' to Lillie little by little?"
"I believed you then, and chose to hide things."
Though her strength was mostly spent, the way Lana looked at him still felt sharp—as if she could see through their souls and count how many times they'd had jelly.
"So what happened next? Lillie still didn't learn a damn thing—and the weight of the hat on her head only got heavier!"
"If I keep doing things your way, she'll only keep getting fed more lies, and more horns."
"She might never even find out the holy sins you've committed behind her back. Am I wrong?"
"…"
She… she wasn't wrong.
Even if every incident had its own reasons, Haru had to admit: yeah, he'd done a lot of stuff he probably shouldn't have.
Though if he could go back in time… let's be real, he'd probably do it all over again, step by step.
Admitting he messed up ≠ being too scared to do it next time.
Lana didn't care what Haru was thinking, and just kept laying it out:
"That's exactly why, in times like these, you need a wall-breaker like me."
"I'll tear this false starry sky apart using the simplest and most direct method!"
"I know what you're thinking—that you could erase my memory or destroy the evidence through some physical means—but that's pointless now."
"Because the moment I played dead after losing, I'd already set everything in motion."
"And if you still want to lay hands on me… then go ahead. I've got nothing left to fear."
After letting it all out, Lana felt like a weight had lifted from her chest.
No matter what happened next, at least for now, she felt free.
"Uh, it's not that serious… I do plan to come clean with Lillie eventually," Haru muttered. "But aren't you also part of the 'torment-Lillie' gang? If you spill everything, won't she end up hating you too?"
Facing this girl radiating I-fear-no-authority energy, Haru didn't even know how to respond.
To be fair, he really hadn't meant to hurt Lillie. Things just… spiraled, okay?
"So what? You guys did way worse than me. She'll be way angrier at you."
"Besides, I've already switched sides and seen the light. She won't blame me for what happened in the past!"
"…Alright then, if that's what you're set on doing…"
Haru sighed and shook his head, turning to Mew. "Mew, go treat Solgaleo and Nebby. We're leaving."
"Oh… and about Necrozma. Lana, you said earlier she's willing to be caught?"
At that point, Haru was completely thrown off.
He hadn't even fought Necrozma properly. Just because he gave her a harsh "lesson" thinking she was Lana… now she suddenly wanted to follow him?
Other protagonists win over Legendary Pokémon with barbecue. And here he was, using… a different kind of skewer?
Was he secretly born with the mythical Ice Pop Sacred Body?
But this didn't make sense either—shouldn't there at least be some playing-hard-to-get? She didn't even get a taste and already came running?
"Yes," Lana confirmed. "According to her, as long as you can ease the pain caused by her hunger for light, she's willing to follow you. She thinks you're a human of unparalleled wisdom and must have plenty of ways to achieve that."
"…I see."
Somehow tongue-tied, Haru pulled out a commemorative Poké Ball—he decided to catch this unmerged "Big Neko" first, then figure out how to turn her into her true "form" later.
But just as he was about to throw it, Mew's voice rang out again.
"Or… what if we made her fall in love with the pain itself? I'm actually really experienced in that area! Plus, I already have one successful case study."
"Your Pokémon seriously need proper education."
"I completely agree."
—
"Is this really necessary? Why do I have to play 'My Heart Will Go On' on the flute right now, of all times? That guy is still educating his Pokémon, for crying out loud! Aren't you going to stop him?"
Lana, wearing nothing but streamers, clutched her flute with twitching lips.
Across from her, Lillie gave a cool, silent nod.
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