*November 20th - 11:00 AM Central Time*
Haruki was deep in conversation with Dr. Patel about Yale's postdoc offer when a small tornado in human form burst into the Northwestern psychology department's main office. The tornado had short black hair, wire-rimmed glasses slightly askew, and was speaking at approximately three times normal human conversational speed while juggling a laptop, two coffee cups, and what appeared to be a stack of research printouts.
"—and I know you're probably thinking this is completely inappropriate and I should have made an appointment but I've been following your research since the Michigan presentation went viral and I have seventeen different questions about your data analysis methodology plus some suggestions about sample size optimization that I think could really help with your replication studies and also I brought coffee because I figured you probably get interrupted by random graduate students all the time and coffee makes everything less annoying, right?"
The tornado stopped in front of Haruki's desk, finally pausing to breathe while extending one of the coffee cups toward him with a smile that was equal parts nervous and determined.
"I'm Sana Kiryuu," she continued before he could respond. "Computational linguistics PhD, third year, University of Chicago. I analyze communication patterns in social media data, which is probably completely irrelevant to your relationship research except that it's actually super relevant because communication patterns are the foundation of everything you're studying and I've been thinking about how your critical period hypothesis could be tested using linguistic analysis of text messages and emails and dating app conversations and—"
"Sana," Dr. Patel interrupted gently, "perhaps we should start with hello?"
"Right. Hello!" Sana's smile got wider, if that was possible. "I'm sorry, I get excited about research and forget how to human properly. It's a character flaw I'm working on. Well, not really working on because it's actually pretty useful for data analysis but working on for social situations like this one where I probably sound completely unhinged."
Haruki found himself grinning despite the interruption. There was something infectious about Sana's enthusiasm that reminded him of his own excitement when he first discovered attachment theory.
"Did you say computational linguistics?" he asked, accepting the coffee cup. "How did you even hear about our research?"
"Oh my god, are you kidding? Your Michigan presentation has been shared in like every psychology and linguistics research group I follow. Plus Dr. Richardson posted the video on the department website and I've probably watched it seven times taking notes because your methodology is brilliant but I kept thinking about how you could scale it using natural language processing and machine learning algorithms to analyze communication patterns in thousands of couples simultaneously instead of just doing intensive case studies and—"
"Breathe," Dr. Patel suggested.
"Right. Breathing. Important for sustained speech production." Sana took an exaggerated deep breath. "Sorry. When I get excited about research possibilities, my brain starts moving faster than my mouth can keep up with, which creates this feedback loop where I talk faster to catch up with my thoughts but that just makes my thoughts move faster and before you know it I sound like a research paper being read at double speed."
"That's actually fascinating from a psycholinguistic perspective," Haruki said, genuinely intrigued. "Do you notice the same pattern in your written communication?"
"Oh no, writing gives me time to organize my thoughts properly. It's only in real-time conversation that I turn into an academic chipmunk. Which is probably why I prefer data analysis to human interaction most of the time, except when the human interaction is about data analysis, in which case I get so excited that I forget to be socially anxious and just start talking like this and—"
"Sana," Dr. Patel said again, but she was smiling now. "What exactly are you proposing?"
"Right. Proposal. I have a proposal." Sana set her laptop on Haruki's desk and opened it with the kind of dramatic flourish usually reserved for major presentations. "I've been analyzing dating app conversation data for my dissertation—anonymized and IRB-approved, obviously—and I think I can identify critical period markers in text-based communication that correspond to your attachment development findings."
She clicked through a series of graphs and data visualizations that made Haruki's brain immediately switch into research mode.
"Look at this," she continued, her speech slowing slightly as she focused on the technical explanation. "I can track linguistic complexity, emotional vocabulary usage, response time patterns, and conversation topic evolution over the first ninety days of couples' digital communication. And the patterns I'm seeing align almost perfectly with your critical period hypothesis."
Haruki leaned forward, studying the data with growing excitement. "These response time patterns—they show increased synchronization around the sixty-day mark?"
"Exactly! And look at the emotional vocabulary data—couples who develop what you'd probably categorize as secure attachment show specific linguistic markers starting around day forty-five and stabilizing by day seventy-five."
"This is incredible. You're tracking critical period development through communication analysis?"
"I'm tracking what I think is critical period development. I'd need to correlate my linguistic data with your attachment measures to confirm the connection, which is why I'm here making what is probably a completely inappropriate research proposal to someone I've never actually met before today."
Dr. Patel looked between Haruki and Sana with the expression of someone watching an academic meet-cute unfold in real time.
"What exactly are you proposing?" she asked.
"Collaboration," Sana said simply. "I have access to massive datasets of couple communication data and the technical skills to analyze linguistic patterns at scale. You have a validated theoretical framework and established methodology for measuring attachment development. Together, we could test the critical period hypothesis on thousands of couples instead of dozens."
"And you want to do this because...?"
"Because your research is the first relationship psychology work I've seen that actually makes sense from a computational perspective. Most attachment theory relies on self-report measures and subjective assessments, but your approach identifies specific behavioral markers that could be detected and measured through automated analysis."
"Plus," she added, her speech accelerating again, "I've been reading all your papers and interviews and I think what you're doing could actually help people build better relationships instead of just understanding why their relationships fail, which is what most research seems focused on, and I really want to contribute to research that makes people's lives better instead of just making academics feel smart about publishing papers that nobody outside the field will ever read or apply to their actual lives."
Haruki found himself nodding enthusiastically. "That's exactly what we're trying to do. Make relationship science accessible and practical for real couples."
"Plus your approach to studying your own relationship is brilliant because it gives you access to data that external researchers could never collect, but it also creates replication challenges because nobody else can duplicate your exact methodology, which is where computational analysis could really help by identifying the patterns you've discovered in much larger datasets using different collection methods."
"You've really thought this through," Dr. Patel observed.
"I've been thinking about it since I first saw your research three weeks ago. I may have also stalked your academic profiles and read everything you've published and watched all your available presentations and taken detailed notes about potential collaboration opportunities."
"That's..." Haruki paused, unsure whether to be flattered or concerned. "Thorough."
"I prefer 'enthusiastic about research possibilities' to 'academically stalkerish,' but I understand if this whole approach seems weird. I'm not great at normal social interactions, so I tend to go straight to the professional collaboration proposal without building appropriate personal rapport first."
"Actually," Haruki said, looking at the data still displayed on her laptop screen, "I think this might be exactly what our research needs. We've been struggling with how to scale our findings beyond intensive case studies."
"And computational linguistics is perfect for identifying communication patterns that predict relationship outcomes?"
"Exactly. Plus, if we can validate our critical period hypothesis using your linguistic analysis, it would address a lot of the criticism we've been getting about sample size and cultural specificity."
"Because linguistic patterns transcend individual cultural backgrounds while still reflecting universal communication dynamics?"
"Right. And because machine learning analysis eliminates concerns about researcher bias or subjective interpretation."
Dr. Patel watched this rapid exchange of ideas with growing amusement. "Should I leave you two alone to plan your research empire?"
"Actually," Sana said, suddenly looking slightly nervous for the first time since her dramatic entrance, "I should probably mention that I don't actually have approval from my advisor yet to pursue this collaboration. I may have gotten slightly ahead of myself in terms of making concrete proposals before confirming that I'm allowed to work on projects outside my dissertation research."
"What's your dissertation topic?" Haruki asked.
"Linguistic markers of social media engagement in multilingual online communities. Which is fascinating from a computational perspective but not exactly applicable to real-world relationship improvement."
"And you'd rather be working on research that has practical applications?"
"I'd rather be working on research that could actually help people instead of just adding another publication to my CV. Your work is the first psychology research I've seen that combines scientific rigor with genuine practical value."
"So what would you need to make this collaboration work?"
"Permission from my advisor, IRB approval for data sharing, and probably about six months to develop the computational models necessary to analyze couple communication data in ways that align with your theoretical framework."
"And if we could arrange all that?"
"Then I would be the most excited graduate student in the history of computational linguistics research."
Haruki looked at Dr. Patel, who nodded encouragingly.
"I think we should set up a meeting with your advisor and ours to discuss this properly," he said. "But unofficially, I'm very interested in exploring this collaboration."
"Really?" Sana's face lit up like she'd just been told she'd won an academic lottery. "You're seriously interested in working with someone who just barged into your office and started talking at hyperspeed about research ideas?"
"We're interested in working with someone who clearly understands our research goals and has the technical skills to help us achieve them at scale."
"Plus," Dr. Patel added, "anyone brave enough to interrupt a meeting between a graduate student and his advisor clearly has the kind of confidence that makes for good research collaboration."
"I prefer 'strategically impulsive' to 'brave,'" Sana said. "But I'll take it."
As they exchanged contact information and began planning next steps, Haruki found himself energized in a way he hadn't felt since their Michigan presentation. Sana's enthusiasm was infectious, but more than that, her computational approach could solve some of the biggest challenges facing their research.
"One question," he said as she prepared to leave. "How did you know we'd be here today?"
"I may have been monitoring the Northwestern psychology department's social media accounts and noticed that Dr. Patel posted about having meetings with graduate students today, so I figured it was worth a shot to see if you were available for impromptu research discussions."
"That's moderately stalkerish."
"That's strategically efficient research networking. There's a difference."
"I'm not sure there is."
"There is if it leads to productive academic collaboration instead of restraining orders."
After Sana left—still talking rapidly as she disappeared down the hallway—Dr. Patel turned to Haruki with an expression of amused curiosity.
"Well," she said, "that was certainly interesting."
"She's brilliant."
"She's also clearly dealing with some kind of social anxiety that she manages by talking extremely fast and focusing intensely on research."
"Is that a problem?"
"It's not a problem if you and Noa are comfortable working with someone who processes social interactions very differently than you do. But it's something to be aware of as you consider collaboration."
"Her research proposal is exactly what we need to address the scalability issues with our methodology."
"And her personality?"
"Her personality is enthusiastic, intelligent, and focused on research that matters. What's not to like?"
"Nothing, necessarily. I'm just observing that she seems to use academic intensity as a way of managing social discomfort, which could create interesting dynamics in a collaborative relationship."
"Meaning?"
"Meaning she might be brilliant at research collaboration and terrible at personal boundaries. Just something to keep in mind as you move forward."
As Haruki walked back to his apartment that afternoon, he found himself thinking about Sana's rapid-fire enthusiasm and obvious social awkwardness. There was something endearing about her complete lack of traditional social filters—the way she'd barged into their meeting, launched into complex research proposals, and admitted to academically stalking their work without any apparent embarrassment.
But there was also something slightly lonely about her intensity, as if she'd learned to connect with people through shared intellectual interests because direct social connection felt too risky or complicated.
He was curious to see how Noa would react to their potential new collaborator, and whether Sana's computational approach could really help them scale their research in ways that maintained its practical value while addressing academic critics.
Either way, their work was about to get more interesting.
---
*End of Chapter 14*