I had just wrapped up my GQ cover interview and was sipping sugar-free Coke, contemplating whether to buy SpaceX or invest in Mars-based Roomba robots, when my assistant burst through the door.
"Boss! The UN Secretary-General is on the line—he's been waiting five minutes!"
I set my drink down, grinning.
"Does he want me to give a speech, or subcontract peacekeeping work?"
The lights in the conference room dimmed. My 3D holo-projection flickered to life, stabilizing in front of the iconic blue-and-white UN backdrop.
Across from me, the Secretary-General looked as if he'd just swallowed a stapler—perfect suit, tight expression.
"Mr. XiaoHan. Your AegisX system successfully intercepted 14 rogue drones over the Mediterranean. You've averted a potential border war. We'd like to request authorization for global deployment."
I raised an eyebrow.
"Deployment's fine. But on one condition—every successful drone intercept must be followed by a 10-second clip of Magic Mike: Tactical Edition."
Silence.
Even the background translator stopped typing.
Three seconds later, the Secretary-General cleared his throat.
"We... can discuss licensing rights."
Another paycheck. Sweet.