Kazuki had three rules for living in this world so far:
Never assume anything is "normal."
Always double-check the quest scroll.
If a bird and a snake both give you side-eye, you're probably the idiot.
Today, all three rules were broken.
"Alright," Kazuki said, unrolling his latest Rank F quest scroll. "Simple delivery. No monsters. No mysteries. Just bring this crate to the next town over."
"Sounds peaceful," Saya said, smirking over her tea. "Which probably means you'll set something on fire by accident."
Kazuki narrowed his eyes. "I've only done that once. And it was only a table."
[QUEST: Slime Delivery – Rank F]
Client: Archmage Tozuka
Package: Contained Slime Specimen
Destination: Enmei Arcanum, North Post
Warning: DO NOT OPEN THE BOX.
"Slime specimen?" Kazuki tilted the crate. It jiggled. Something inside made a squelchy boing sound.
Tala looked intrigued.
Oro looked mildly offended.
Kazuki looked… curious.
"…It's probably just a harmless blob, right? Like the tutorial monster in video games?"
The crate wiggled.
"…I'm gonna pretend I didn't see that."
✦
The walk through the northern trade path was uneventful.
For five minutes.
Then the crate exploded.
BOING!
Something launched itself from inside with a chirpy noise and smacked Kazuki in the face like a jelly pancake.
"MMFFFF!"
Tala squawked. Oro hissed.
Kazuki pulled the thing off his face.
It blinked.
The thing was a slime, but not just any slime. It was glossy, translucent, and shimmered with a faint rainbow hue. Two black dot-eyes blinked up at him with eerie innocence.
It… smiled.
"Hello?" Kazuki said.
The slime vibrated.
A screen popped.
[UNCLASSIFIED ENTITY: "Smile" has chosen you.]
Smile does not follow the system.
System will attempt to categorize.
System has failed.
Congratulations. You are now followed by an anomaly.
"Uhhhh."
Smile bounced happily in place.
Oro slithered backward a full meter.
Tala backed into a tree.
"…Why are you both scared?" Kazuki asked.
Smile floated up and hovered.
Then it duplicated itself.
Then it set a tree on fire.
"…WHAT."
Smile giggled. Not vocally. But emotionally. Kazuki felt the giggle in his soul.
Smile has used [???].
You don't know what just happened.
The local squirrels have fled in fear.
You gained +3 Confusion.
Kazuki sat down.
"So. You're a chaos slime. You don't obey rules. And you like me?"
Smile bounced. Boing.
"Cool. That's terrifying."
As they arrived at the next outpost, smoke trailing behind them, the guards stared wide-eyed.
"Did you defeat a rogue fire elemental?!"
"No."
"Then… what happened?"
Kazuki opened his mouth.
Smile floated beside him. Smiling.
The guards took a step back.
"…Nevermind," they said. "You're clearly a specialist."
They let him through. Gave him bonus silver.
Tala screeched. Oro hissed low.
Kazuki looked at Smile. Smile blinked innocently.
"…You're going to cause the end of the world one day, aren't you?"
Boing.
✦
Back at the inn that night, Kazuki checked his screen again.
[LEVEL UP: 5 ➝ 6]
New Passive: "Unpredictable Aura"
People think you know what you're doing.
You don't. But now they fear you anyway.
He stared at his three companions:
A regal eagle with a sharp screech.
A jungle cobra with a crown-like hood.
A smiling slime that broke causality.
"…I don't deserve any of you," he muttered.
Smile jiggled up his leg and curled into a pillow on his head.
He sighed.
And fell asleep.