It was early Thursday morning, and a light rain fell over the city.Sakurai Saki's vision had finally cleared—no more ghosts clinging to his sight. For once, he was in a good mood. The rain helped.
Rainy days were peaceful. The quiet tap of droplets against the pavement, the gentle patter on windows—it was like the world had turned down its volume. A perfect day to be alone with your thoughts.
The white-haired ghost girl might still be following him around, but out of sight, out of mind.
Umbrella in hand, the view ahead was a little blurry. Outside the school gate, rain dripped steadily from the trees lining the sidewalk.
On a day like this, even the most hard-working Disciplinary Committee member should take it easy, right?Sakurai Saki certainly thought so.
Would anyone seriously stand at the school gate for an hour in the rain just to catch uniform violations?
…Yes. Yes, they would.
And her name was Iino Miko.
Serious, responsible, and—unfortunately for her—adorably easy to tease.
Physically, she was small and delicate, the kind of junior that made upperclassmen instinctively want to protect her. Personality-wise? Unyielding. Dutiful. Utterly earnest. The perfect target.
Sakurai had a very scientific ranking system for teasing.
Fujiwara Chika was A-rank. Always full of weird reactions and unexpected counters. Teasing her was a joy.
Iino Miko—a new favorite—was quickly rising. If possible, Sakurai would recruit her into the Student Council just so he could tease her daily. She was also A-rank. Without a doubt.
Below A-rank were the more complex cases:
B-rank: Hayasaka Ai.Beautiful and composed, but hard to read. She rarely gave satisfying feedback. Still, watching her was aesthetically pleasing, even if she did nothing.
C-rank: Shinomiya Kaguya.A ticking time bomb. Razor-sharp tongue, queenly pride. Teasing her usually devolved into heated debates or cold wars. Recently, she'd been especially unpredictable—asking about his relationship with Secretary Fujiwara one day, and muttering darkly about male students who dared to write her love letters the next.
Ice Kaguya was terrifying. Beautiful, yes. But terrifying.
As Sakurai approached the school gates, the rain tapping against his umbrella, he was greeted by a familiar voice.
"Sakurai-senpai! Your collar's wet."
It was Iino Miko, standing under the eaves in a raincoat, her eyes narrowed in concern.
Sakurai adjusted his collar wordlessly and continued walking.
Miko: "?"
She blinked. Was Senpai… ignoring her?
That little pang in her chest—was that disappointment?
She didn't like that feeling. Not one bit.
"Um… Senpai!" she called after him, hurrying over.
He turned, mildly surprised. His train ride had been slow and packed—he wasn't in a rush, but he also hadn't expected her to chase him down.
Miko handed him something.
"Here. Also… those candies you gave me were delicious."
Three neatly wrapped pieces of chocolate were pressed into his hand. Before he could say anything, she turned and walked quickly back toward the entrance, cheeks slightly red.
Her thoughts were as follows:A bribe must be returned.But a simple exchange of gifts? Not a bribe.She hadn't used her authority to help Sakurai in any way—so morally, this was just… leveling the scales.
This makes us even, she told herself firmly.
Sakurai stared at the chocolates in his hand. "…Huh?"
He had no idea what just happened. But he pocketed the chocolates anyway.Noon — Student Council RoomSakurai sat at the table, staring at the chocolates as if they were some sort of puzzle box.
"Shirogane," he asked suddenly, "if a junior gives you chocolate out of nowhere… what do you think it means?"
"Cough—cough cough—what?!"Shirogane Miyuki choked on his rice and stared at him like he'd just confessed to murder.
"You good?" Sakurai raised an eyebrow.
"I… I've never even gotten a gift from a junior! And you're asking me that?!" Shirogane wailed internally.
He was a complete beginner in the realm of love. A pure Shirogane—never even held hands.
In his mind, romance was like a video game, and he hadn't even cleared the tutorial:Gold Rank: Holding hands.Platinum Rank: Hugging.Diamond Rank: Dating.King Rank: Kissing.God Rank: Booking a hotel room."You're the guy who became every girl's boyfriend yesterday," Shirogane grumbled, half-joking. "Isn't it normal for a junior to give you chocolate?"
"But it's chocolate, meow!" Sakurai insisted, completely serious—Wait. Meow?
Shirogane paused. "What the hell was that verbal tic?"
Sakurai looked mortified. "I've been watching too much late-night anime…"
Shirogane sighed. "You know, Sakurai… I have a friend who's wondering how to become more popular."
Sakurai stared at him.
"…Is this friend you?"
"No! It's my friend's friend!" Shirogane said quickly.
"…You mean me?"
They looked at each other in silence.
"It's not me, it's my friend," Shirogane Miyuki interrupted quickly.
Sakurai didn't buy it for a second, but fine—let's humor the lie.
"Alright, let's say it's your friend," Sakurai replied, deadpan. "Then here's what I'd tell him: The prerequisite to being popular is being good-looking. Meow."
"…Did you just meow again?"
"Focus, Shirogane. This is important."
Shirogane sighed, internally noting that Sakurai was descending further into anime-induced madness.
"Girls are visual creatures," Sakurai continued, very seriously. "So are boys. People say stuff like, 'Oh, I want a soulmate. Personality matters more than looks.' Lies. All lies."
He leaned forward, tapping the table for emphasis.
"If you could date someone hot, why settle for someone ugly? Come on."
"Aren't you being kind of shallow right now…?" Shirogane muttered, uneasy.
"I'm being honest," Sakurai shot back. "In ancient times, when a hero saved a beauty, she'd still have to think it over—'Should I repay him in this life, or the next?' Not even gratitude overrides aesthetics!"
"…You've been reading weird things again, haven't you?"
"Listen, as long as you're good-looking, even if your personality is trash, someone will still fall for you. Meow."
"Stop doing that."
Sakurai ignored him. "Take Hayasaka Ai, for example. She doesn't even try, but her admirer count is ridiculous. Maybe it's not obvious, but her love letter count is neck-and-neck with Shinomiya's. Might even beat her some months."
Shirogane blinked. "Seriously?"
"Yep. Ai's got that gal energy. Laid-back, casual, approachable. Shinomiya, on the other hand, gives off 'Don't even breathe near me' vibes. That lady-of-the-house elegance? Intimidating."
And just as Sakurai mentioned her, fate answered with perfect comedic timing.
Creeeak.
The door opened.
Footsteps echoed. Slow. Deliberate. Almost… unnatural.
Sakurai turned toward the sound—then paused.
A girl entered the room.
Technically, it was Kaguya Shinomiya. But at the moment, she bore zero resemblance to her usual self.
Her smile was… off. Way too stiff. The kind of smile you'd see on a mannequin. Her movements were stilted, like she was moving through molasses—or possessed.
If Ice Kaguya had always been intimidating and composed, this version? This was Zombie Kaguya.
Sakurai narrowed his eyes, intrigued. What fresh chaos was this?
"Shinomiya-san, good afternoon~" he called out, unusually friendly. Might as well poke the bear.
Zombie Kaguya blinked at him with mechanical slowness… then smiled wider. Unnaturally wide.
She shuffled over and—shockingly—sat down right next to him.
Right. Next. To him.
Sakurai arched an eyebrow.
'Did I accidentally walk into a different universe?'
Meanwhile, inside Zombie Kaguya's brain:
Hayasaka said this would be hard. That I'd fumble it. That my pride would get in the way.
But look at me now. Sitting next to Sakurai Saki like it's nothing. Natural as breathing.
Hah. Watch me. I'll conquer him in one day.
Just you wait.
I'll definitely win!
Kaguya Shinomiya was confident.Possessed. But confident.
P@treon Rene_chan