Lunch time at Sakura High School was chaos incarnate. Students flooded the cafeteria, the courtyard, and every available space with the energy of small nuclear reactors. Kenji, carrying a bento box that he'd bought from a convenience store (because apparently seventeen-year-olds didn't meal prep), wandered the halls looking for somewhere quiet to eat and contemplate his life choices.
That's when he spotted her: Agent Sato, standing in the doorway of the faculty room wearing a professional blazer and the kind of subtle makeup that screamed "responsible adult." At twenty-one, she could actually pass for a young teacher, which made Kenji's situation seem even more absurd by comparison.
"Takahashi-kun!" she called out, then quickly corrected herself. "I mean, good afternoon, student whose name I definitely don't know!"
Kenji glanced around to make sure no one was watching, then approached. "Agent Sato."
"Please, call me Sato-sensei while we're here! I'm trying to maintain my cover as a legitimate educator."
"Right. How's the whole 'being an adult' thing working out for you?"
Sato's professional composure cracked slightly. "Honestly? It's terrifying. Do you know how much responsibility teachers have? I've been here three hours and I'm already worried about corrupting young minds."
"Well, you're doing better than me. I've been propositioned twice, invited to join a snack-sharing gang, and complimented on my 'mature' appearance by approximately fifteen different people."
"Wait, what do you mean propositioned?"
Kenji rubbed his temples. "Apparently, looking like someone's father makes me 'distinguished' and 'mysterious.' Who knew?"
"That's..." Sato paused, clearly trying not to laugh. "That's actually kind of concerning from a mission standpoint."
"You think?"
"Have you made any progress on the investigation?"
Kenji looked around conspiratorially, then leaned closer. "I've discovered that third-year students complain about homework and eat snacks. Truly shocking intelligence."
"What about the pudding situation?"
"The what now?"
"The International Pudding Cartel? The reason we're here?"
Kenji stared at her for a long moment. "Agent Sato, I'm going to be honest with you. I've been so focused on not getting arrested for inadvertently flirting with minors that I completely forgot we're supposed to be investigating dessert-related crimes."
"Maybe we should actually start doing our jobs?"
"Probably. But first, I need to figure out how to get through the rest of the day without anyone else telling me I'm 'husband material.'"
"Someone said you were husband material?"
"Yamamoto Yuki. She sits next to me in homeroom. Sweet girl, but if anyone catches me talking to her outside of class, I'm pretty sure I'll end up on the evening news."
Sato nodded sympathetically. "Being undercover is hard."
"You're a teacher. You're supposed to talk to students. I'm supposedly a student who looks old enough to have fought in World War II."
"You don't look that old."
"I grunt when I stand up, Sato. I made that noise three times just walking over here."
Their conversation was interrupted by the arrival of another teacher, a energetic woman in her thirties with the kind of smile that suggested she genuinely enjoyed working with teenagers.
"Sato-sensei! How are you settling in?" The woman turned to Kenji with curiosity. "And who's this? A very tall student!"
"This is Takahashi-kun," Sato replied smoothly. "He was just asking about supplemental English materials."
"How wonderful! A student who's proactive about learning. You should be proud, young man."
Kenji felt his soul leave his body slightly. "Thank you... sensei."
"My, you're very polite! And so mature-sounding. Are you planning to attend university?"
"I... haven't decided yet."
"Well, you have plenty of time to think about it. You seem like the type who would do well in a professional environment. Very responsible-looking."
After the teacher left, Sato turned to Kenji with barely contained amusement. "You realize she was basically saying you look like a businessman, right?"
"I know what she was saying."
"And you just went along with it."
"What was I supposed to do? Admit I'm a forty-year-old government agent infiltrating their school to investigate a pudding conspiracy?"
"Point taken."
The bell rang, signaling the end of lunch period. Students began streaming back toward their classrooms with the resigned energy of people returning to prison.
"I should get back to my classroom," Sato said. "Try not to get engaged to any of your classmates."
"Very funny."
"I'm serious, though. This situation is getting weird, even by our standards."
Kenji watched her walk back toward the faculty room, then turned to face the hallway full of teenagers who apparently thought he belonged among them. In the distance, he could see Yamamoto Yuki waving at him with the kind of enthusiasm that made his knees hurt just watching.
"This is fine," he muttered to himself. "Everything is completely normal."